Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The diagram illustrates the process of sugar making. It demonstrates that sugar canes are grown in 12-18 months and then they are harvested by either a machine or a human. In third world countries sugar canes are harvested mainly humans, while in the first world countries this process is done by machines. Moving on, after harvesting is done the sugar canes are crushed to extract their juice, the juice is also consumed as a refreshing drink on a hot summer day. After the juice is extracted it is then purified through a limestone filter. Afterwards, the purified juice is evaporated to make a syrup, this syrup is then solidified to be used as brown sugar. After the evaporation, the syrup is passed from the Centrifuge to separate the sugar crystals. At the end, the sugar crystals are dried and cooled down to obtain sugar. Optionally, it can be further processed to get powdered sugar.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main stages of the sugar production process, from harvesting to the final product. However, it lacks a clear overview or summary of the process, which is essential for a Band 7 or higher. The inclusion of subjective information, such as the juice being a 'refreshing drink on a hot summer day,' is irrelevant to the task and should be avoided in an Academic Task 1 report. Furthermore, the distinction between 'first world' and 'third world' countries is not supported by the diagram provided, representing an external addition that does not accurately reflect the prompt's data.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is written as a single block of text, which significantly hinders the logical presentation of information. A process description should be structured into clear paragraphs (e.g., introduction, main stages, and final processing). While some cohesive devices like 'Afterwards' and 'Moving on' are used, the overall flow is somewhat mechanical. The lack of paragraphing makes the text feel like a list of steps rather than a cohesive report. To improve, you should group the stages logically and use a wider variety of linking words to connect the steps more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing for a basic description of the process. You use some relevant technical terms such as 'purified,' 'evaporated,' 'solidified,' and 'centrifuge.' However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on simple phrasing. The phrase 'sugar making' is a bit informal; 'sugar production' or 'the manufacturing process of sugar' would be more appropriate. Additionally, the term 'first world' and 'third world' is not precise in this context. Expanding your range of process-related verbs and nouns would help elevate your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical issues, such as 'harvested mainly humans' (missing the preposition 'by') and 'passed from the Centrifuge' (the preposition 'through' would be more accurate). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several comma splices where two independent clauses are joined incorrectly. While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in preposition use and sentence construction prevent the response from reaching a higher band. Focusing on sentence variety and proofreading for small grammatical slips will be beneficial.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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