Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The sugar cane is grew by the farmers. This process takes 12-18 months depends on working conditions and weather. When sugar cane is fully prepared, the workers harvest it with their proper tools. this is difficult phase for them because i requires a lot of hard work. after harvesting it, they loaded the trucks or any suitable vehicle with sugar cane. Truck drivers go to mill and unload all the sugar cane to certain place where crushing plants crush it and the juice is made. This juice has more impurities that is why this is transferred to limestone filter. Lime stone filter removes the impurities from the juice. Then, purified juice is transferred to evaporator. The heat is given to it and juice becomes synap. After that this is passed from the centrifugal process. this process convert it into crystal sugar. at the last, this crystal sugar is dried and cold. Now, The process is completed and the sugar is ready for normal usage.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main stages of the process, from harvesting to the final product. However, it lacks an overview, which is a critical requirement for Task 1. The description is somewhat narrative rather than analytical, focusing on the actions of the farmers and drivers rather than the mechanical process itself. To improve, you should group the stages logically (e.g., preparation, processing, and refinement) and provide a clear summary of the overall transformation. The inclusion of subjective commentary, such as 'this is a difficult phase for them because it requires a lot of hard work,' is inappropriate for an Academic Task 1 report, which should remain objective and focused on the data or process provided.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is written as a single block of text, which significantly hinders readability and logical progression. Paragraphing is essential in IELTS writing to separate distinct stages of a process. While there are some cohesive devices used, such as 'after harvesting it' and 'then,' the flow is somewhat mechanical. The referencing is occasionally unclear, and the lack of paragraph breaks makes the text feel like a list of steps rather than a cohesive report. To reach a higher band, you must organize the information into clear paragraphs, such as one for the initial harvesting and another for the industrial processing stages.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate to describe the process, but it is somewhat repetitive and lacks the precision required for a higher band. Phrases like 'proper tools' and 'suitable vehicle' are vague. There are also some errors in word choice, such as 'synap' (likely intended to be 'syrup') and 'cold' (which should be the adjective 'cooled'). The vocabulary is limited to basic terms, and there is little attempt to use more sophisticated or technical language related to industrial manufacturing processes. Expanding your range of process-related verbs and nouns will help improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include 'The sugar cane is grew' (passive voice error: should be 'is grown'), 'depends on' (should be 'depending on'), and 'this is transferred to limestone filter' (missing article: 'a limestone filter'). The sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited use of complex sentences. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several instances of missing capital letters at the start of sentences. To improve, focus on mastering passive voice constructions, which are essential for process descriptions, and ensure subject-verb agreement and correct article usage.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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