Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The diagram illustrates the process by which sugarcane is turned into sugar.
Overall the process cycle is divided into 3 categories; cultivating sugar cane, the standard time period is 12-18 months, picking the matured crops through heavy machinery and crushing the sugar canes.
Initially, the harvested crops will be gathered by both means of machinery and human labor. The crops send to mill and the juice is extracted by crushing via a massive machine. Thereafter, the juice is purified by a special filter which is made up with limestone. Furthermore, sugar cane juice is converted into syrup by heating. The same process is referred to as Evaporator. In this syrup it contains sugar crystals therefore this undergo through the stage of cantrifuge which operates with air.
Ultimately, the output of sugar is coming to an effect after drying and cooling by using a vessel in a shape of a cylinder
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main stages of the process, from cultivation to the final product. However, the overview is slightly disjointed, as it includes specific details like the 12-18 month growth period rather than focusing on the broader manufacturing stages. While the key steps are identified, the description of the 'centrifuge' and 'evaporator' stages is somewhat inaccurate or confusingly phrased, which limits the clarity of the process explanation. To reach a higher band, ensure the overview highlights the main trends or stages without getting bogged down in minor details, and ensure the technical steps are described with greater precision.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of the process. Cohesive devices such as 'Initially', 'Thereafter', 'Furthermore', and 'Ultimately' are used to link the stages. However, the flow within the paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, and the transition between the cultivation phase and the industrial processing phase is abrupt. The use of referencing is generally clear, but the sentence structure occasionally feels disjointed, impacting the overall flow. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with terms like 'cultivating', 'extracted', 'purified', and 'centrifuge' used correctly. However, there are some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'coming to an effect' and 'the output of sugar is coming to an effect'. Additionally, the phrase 'made up with limestone' is slightly unnatural; 'composed of' or 'using' would be more precise. The range of vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, but it lacks the sophistication and precision required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'The crops send to mill' (passive voice error: 'are sent to the mill') and 'In this syrup it contains' (redundant subject). The sentence 'The same process is referred to as Evaporator' is also grammatically awkward. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to affect the overall quality. To improve, focus on mastering passive voice constructions, which are essential for process descriptions, and ensure subject-verb agreement is consistent throughout the text.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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