Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The gives process information about the manufacturing how to making sugar from sugar cane.

Overall, it can be clearly seen that it has seven steps process started with growing sugar canes and ended with sugar in drying and cooling.it is man made process and some type of complecetad.

To started with growing sugar canes in within 12 to 18 months. Afthere that it is colected in two type of way which are machinary and harvesting of human. Threed step in crushing sugar canes and canes convted by juice. Solid from to liuqvid. Afther that this type of juice get to purifycation added to limestone. and limestone added juice get heated machin and still juice become syrup. It is juiced separatrs sugar crystals from syrup. and finally sugar canes maked sugar and last procces liqued drying and cooling.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While the student attempts to describe the stages of the sugar production process, the summary is incomplete and lacks the necessary detail to fully report the main features. The description of the steps is often confusing, such as the mention of 'machinary and harvesting of human' and the unclear explanation of the purification and separation stages. The response lacks a clear, logical overview of the entire process, and the failure to reach the minimum length prevents a more thorough development of the information provided in the diagram.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The essay lacks a clear structure. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the progression of ideas is disjointed and difficult to follow. Cohesive devices are either missing or used incorrectly, such as 'To started with' and 'Afthere that', which makes the flow of information mechanical and often confusing. The lack of logical transitions between the stages of the manufacturing process makes it difficult for the reader to understand the sequence of events. The referencing is also unclear, particularly in the final paragraph where the connection between the syrup, crystals, and the final product is poorly articulated.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary is very limited and repetitive, often relying on basic or incorrectly formed words. There are numerous spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'complecetad', 'colected', 'convted', 'purifycation', and 'procces'. These errors, combined with awkward phrasing like 'harvesting of human' and 'juice get heated machin', impede communication. The student struggles to use appropriate technical terminology related to the process, which is essential for an Academic Task 1 response. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the information accurately or with any degree of precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that often obscure the intended meaning. Sentence structures are simple and frequently flawed, such as 'The gives process information about the manufacturing how to making sugar' and 'It is man made process and some type of complecetad.' There is a lack of control over basic verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and word order. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing capital letters at the start of sentences and misuse of periods. The lack of complex sentence structures and the high frequency of errors make the text difficult to read.

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