Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Overall, manufacturing of sugar involves several stages, beginning with the growing and harvesting of of sugar canes and ending with the drying and cooling of sugar crystals. The sugar undergoes a series of processes, including crushing, purifying, evoprating, separating, drying and cooling, before the final sugar graules are produced. The manufacturing process of sugar starts with the growing of sugar canes which take almost 12-18 months to grow. Fully grown sugar cane can be harvested with two methods, either harvesting it with machine like tractor or by hands with the use of pruning hook. After harvesting sugar canes, they undergo a crusing machine to produce its juice. This sugar cane juice is then added to limestine filter to purify it. After purifying, juice is added to the evaporator under heating, where sugar cane juice turned into syrup. After that, a centrifuge machine is used to separated the sugar crystals from the syrup. These crystals are then dried and cool down to eventually produce a sugar.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all stages of the process, from harvesting to the final product. You have successfully identified the main features and provided a clear overview. However, the response is presented as a single block of text, which makes it difficult to follow the logical progression of the manufacturing stages. While you mention the methods of harvesting, you could improve by using more precise terminology for the stages (e.g., 'crushing' rather than 'undergo a crushing machine'). Overall, the information is accurate and addresses the prompt well, but it lacks a clear structure that would help the reader distinguish between the different phases of the process.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response lacks paragraphing, which is a significant issue for a process description. A better approach would be to group the stages into logical paragraphs, such as 'Preparation and Harvesting', 'Processing', and 'Refining'. While you use some cohesive devices like 'After harvesting' and 'After that', the flow is somewhat mechanical. The lack of paragraph breaks makes the text feel like a list of steps rather than a cohesive report. To improve, ensure you use a wider variety of linking words and structure your response into at least two or three distinct paragraphs to guide the reader through the process.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe the process, such as 'centrifuge', 'evaporator', and 'purifying'. However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'evoprating', 'graules', and 'limestine', which detract from the quality of the writing. Additionally, some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'undergo a crushing machine' (the cane undergoes crushing, or is passed through a crusher). To reach a higher band, focus on accurate spelling and more precise collocations related to industrial processes. Expanding your vocabulary to include more descriptive verbs and nouns will also help improve your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'harvesting it with machine like tractor' (missing articles) and 'juice turned into syrup' (should be 'is turned' or 'turns'). You also have some issues with subject-verb agreement and preposition usage, such as 'cool down to eventually produce a sugar' (should be 'produce sugar'). While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic articles, verb tenses, and pluralization to improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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