Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The diagram below presents the production process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Overall, there were seven stages in this process of manufacturing sugar from sugar cane, the first stage was the growing of sugar cane, while the last process was dying and cooling. However, crushing has two staged which was crushing the sugar cane to turn it into juice.
They first processed starts with the planting of sugar cane for the duration of 12 to 18 months, when it grew, the next stage is harvesting, this process of harvesting is been done in two methods, it's either it was harvested manual,by cutting it or was done by the used of cutting machine. Then in stage three which was crushing, this took two steps, sugar cane was first put int a crushing machine,where it's back were remove and turned into juice. Then from crushing,it was take into purifying juice where limestone filter removed all the particles.
Stage five was evaporation(juice become syrup), here it was heat and then moved centrifuge for the separation of sugar crystal from syrup. The last stage was drying and cooling.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main stages of the sugar production process, from growing to the final drying and cooling. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate, as it describes the process as having seven stages, whereas the diagram shows a more continuous flow. While the main features are identified, the description of the crushing stage is confusingly phrased, and the explanation of the centrifuge process lacks clarity. To reach a higher band, ensure that the overview provides a more accurate summary of the overall process and that the sequence of steps is described with greater precision, avoiding contradictory statements about the number of stages.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. For example, the transition 'Then from crushing, it was take into purifying' is grammatically disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is often repetitive or misused, such as the frequent reliance on 'Then' to start sentences. Paragraphing is present but could be more effectively used to separate the distinct phases of the process (e.g., preparation, processing, and refinement). Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence follows logically from the previous one will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate to describe the process, but there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations. For example, 'it's back were remove' is incorrect (likely meant 'bark'), and 'purifying juice' should be 'purification'. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic verbs like 'put', 'turned', and 'moved'. To improve, you should focus on using more precise technical terminology related to industrial processes, such as 'extracted', 'filtered', 'separated', and 'refined'. Additionally, ensure that you proofread for spelling errors and incorrect word forms, as these detract from the overall quality of the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'They first processed starts'), incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'it was take'), and punctuation errors. The sentence structure is often fragmented, making it difficult to follow the sequence of events. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, particularly the use of passive voice, which is essential for describing processes. Ensure that you maintain consistent tense usage throughout the report and pay closer attention to article usage and pluralisation.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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