Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.0)

the systematic diagram is given in which making process of sugar extracting from sugar cane is given. the main step pd process is starting growing of sugar cane then harvesting abided extracting juice from sugar cane and then create sugar from that juice

first of all the process of making sugar is begin with growing of sugar cane, which takes almost 12 to 18 months to get prepared from seed to become full plant. When it gets ready next step is to harvest them, this can be done by 2 methods, 1st is by heavy machinery sugarcane is harvest by tractors automatically, another option is manually, individuals harvest the sugar can with their hands by cutting, after that these sugar cane is crushing by crusher to extract juice from them, both residue and juice gets separated.

furthermore, the extracted juice has been taken to purifier i.e, limestone filter, where juice get purify

the followed step is pas through heat process where juice get evaporated and converted into syrup. moreover, centrifuge helps in separating the syrup from crystals and last step is drying and cooling that syrup, it converts into sugar

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main stages of the sugar production process, from growing to the final product. However, the overview is weak; it lacks a clear summary of the key features of the process, such as the transition from raw material to refined product. While the steps are identified, the description of the harvesting methods and the subsequent refining stages is somewhat repetitive and lacks the analytical focus required for a Band 7. The response identifies the main features but does not highlight the most significant aspects or comparisons effectively. To improve, ensure you include a clear, concise overview paragraph that synthesizes the entire process rather than just listing steps.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical flow is hindered by inconsistent punctuation and run-on sentences. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'first of all', 'furthermore', and 'the followed step', they are sometimes used mechanically or incorrectly. The transition between the harvesting stage and the refining stage is abrupt. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs is disjointed due to the lack of proper sentence boundaries. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each sentence is clearly separated by appropriate punctuation would significantly enhance the readability and coherence of the report.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is limited and repetitive. Words like 'get' and 'making' are used frequently where more precise academic alternatives would be appropriate. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'pas through heat process' instead of 'passed through a heating process' and 'create sugar' instead of 'produce sugar'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more specific terminology related to industrial processes, such as 'evaporation', 'crystallization', and 'purification', and avoid informal phrasing. The spelling is mostly accurate, but the range of vocabulary remains basic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response relies heavily on simple sentence structures and contains frequent grammatical errors. There are significant issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'the process... is begin' and 'juice get purify'. Punctuation is a major weakness; many sentences are run-on, lacking full stops or commas, which makes the text difficult to follow. The use of passive voice is attempted, which is appropriate for a process description, but it is often executed with errors, such as 'sugarcane is harvest'. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring correct verb tenses, and using punctuation to clearly define sentence boundaries.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.