Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 4.0)

This Diagram illustrate to the process flow of the making sugar cane.

This Process has start to the growing the sugar canes around 12 to 18 months and then harvest to the sugar cane and crushing via machine and its come out the juice from liquid form that juice purifying via limestone filter and that juice they made a syrup form via helping evaporator the evaporator is giving the heat the juice form is burning and and adapting the thick and made a syrup form that syrup form centrifuge

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, reaching only 89 words. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed, and the description of the process is severely underdeveloped. While the student identifies the main stages—growing, harvesting, crushing, purifying, and evaporating—the lack of detail and the failure to reach the required length significantly impact the score. To improve, the student must provide a more comprehensive overview, include all stages shown in the diagram, and ensure the response is sufficiently long to allow for a full explanation of the process.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response lacks paragraphing and uses very few cohesive devices. The flow of information is disjointed, relying on simple 'and' connectors to link steps. There is no clear introduction or overview, and the lack of transition words makes the sequence of the process feel mechanical and repetitive. To improve, the student should organize the response into logical paragraphs (e.g., an introduction, a body paragraph for the initial stages, and a body paragraph for the final stages) and use a wider range of cohesive devices such as 'subsequently', 'following this', and 'once the process is complete'.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, with several errors in word choice and form, such as 'illustrate to the process' instead of 'illustrates the process' and 'adapting the thick' instead of 'becoming thick'. The range of vocabulary is limited, and the student struggles to use precise technical terms related to the manufacturing process. To improve, the student should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary and ensuring correct word forms. Using more precise verbs and nouns will help convey the information more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that impede clarity. There are significant issues with verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure, such as 'This Process has start to the growing' and 'that juice they made a syrup'. The writing consists mostly of simple, fragmented sentences with incorrect prepositions and articles. There is no evidence of complex sentence structures. To improve, the student needs to focus on basic sentence construction, correct verb tense usage, and the proper application of articles and prepositions.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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