Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given diagram illustrates the process of making sugar from sugar cane.

Overall, There are eight steps of making sugar.

At a fleeing glance, firstly farmers grow sugar cane in land. Next there are two ways to harvesting. Some people use special vehicles and other cut its by themselves. On the next stage, sugar cane putted into a machine for crushing and made its juice. On fourth stage, purifying juice is filtered by the limestone filter.

Moving further, juice is putted into evaporator and it becomes syrup from juice. In six stage separaters sugar crystais from syrup. Now sugar syrup is made in final shape. After that sugar is putted into a big box. In last stage sugar is drying and cooling. Now the sugar is ready for sale.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement. While you have identified the main stages of the process, the description is quite brief and lacks the necessary detail to fully explain the transformation of sugar cane into sugar. For instance, the explanation of the 'centrifuge' (referred to as 'separaters') and the specific temperatures or conditions involved are omitted. To improve, ensure you describe each stage with more precision and include all relevant information provided in the diagram to reach the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive start. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'Next', 'On the next stage', 'Moving further'). The logical flow is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing, such as 'At a fleeing glance', which is not a standard academic transition. To improve, try to vary your linking words and ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next to create a more cohesive narrative of the process.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and contains several inaccuracies. You use 'putted' repeatedly, which is grammatically incorrect (the past participle of 'put' is 'put'). Additionally, terms like 'made its juice' and 'final shape' are imprecise. To reach a higher band, you should use more specific technical vocabulary related to industrial processes, such as 'extracted', 'processed', 'purified', and 'refined'. Expanding your range of verbs and nouns will help you describe the stages more accurately and professionally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly with verb forms and sentence structure. Examples include 'sugar cane putted into a machine', 'other cut its by themselves', and 'sugar crystais from syrup'. These errors, combined with the lack of complex sentence structures, limit your score. Focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of passive voice, which is essential for describing processes. Aim to incorporate more complex structures, such as relative clauses or participial phrases, to improve your grammatical range.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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