Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The given diagram illustrates the manufacturing process of making a sugar from sugar cane in the several industry and the companies.
Overall it can be seen that, their was making a sugar cane has a seven stage of periods. it initiate from Growing sugar canes in the Landscape of farmer.
To commence, growing sugar canes need a 12 to 18 months to grow in the land. However, when the sugar are completely grown so the both machines and individuals are Harvesting on it to make a significant with proper art. Furthermore, after the cutting the sugar canes needs to Crushing to make their juice to drinks for many Residents.
on the other hand, after sugar converting into juice it need to Purifying juice with added a Limestone filter. on account of, to make fresh flavour it transform into Heat Evaporator and juice become syrup. also in many medicine it is very beneficial to make tablets and liquid. on sixth steps Centrifuge and separated sugar crystal from syrup. Final stage to make a sugar cane it need to drying and cooling in big drum.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to describe the sugar manufacturing process but fails to provide a clear, objective summary of the main features. The inclusion of irrelevant information, such as the mention of 'medicine' and 'tablets', indicates a misunderstanding of the task requirements, which is to describe the process shown in the diagram. While the stages are mentioned, the description is often inaccurate or confusing (e.g., 'making a sugar cane' instead of 'sugar production'). The overview is weak and does not effectively highlight the key stages of the process. To improve, focus strictly on the information provided in the diagram and avoid adding external, non-factual commentary.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence' and 'Furthermore', they are often applied incorrectly or in a way that does not enhance the flow of ideas. The transition between steps is mechanical, and the lack of clear, accurate subject-verb agreement makes the progression of the process difficult to follow. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would significantly enhance the coherence of the writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'making a sugar' instead of 'sugar production' and 'Landscape of farmer' instead of 'sugar cane fields'. The student attempts to use process-related vocabulary like 'Crushing', 'Purifying', and 'Centrifuge', but these are often used with incorrect grammatical forms or in inappropriate contexts. The repetition of basic terms and the misuse of technical terminology hinder the clarity of the report. A wider range of precise, process-oriented vocabulary is needed to reach a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are persistent issues with article usage ('a sugar'), subject-verb agreement ('sugar are completely grown'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack the necessary complexity to demonstrate control. For example, 'their was making a sugar cane has a seven stage of periods' is grammatically incoherent. While the meaning can generally be inferred, the high frequency of errors in basic structures prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors would be beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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