Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The diagram illustrates the complete process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Overall, a process contain 7 crucial steps , begin with growing sugar canes and harvesting and other process is performed and making it ready for the customer to buy in a market.
To begin with, in cultivated soil the sugar cane is grown which takes roughly (12 -18 months) to get ready for harvesting. The harvesting can be performed by machinery and also manually. Furthermore, all collected canes are transferred into crushing machine where sugar cane juice is collected. The juice gets filtered by using limestone filter tube. The next step is crucial as collected juice need to heat at measured temperature to transform it into syrup. Finally the fine sugar crystals are gets separates throw centrifuge. Therefore, the last steps contribute to make sugar dry and cool which indicates the final sugar product is ready for the market.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main stages of the sugar production process, from cultivation to the final market-ready product. However, the overview is somewhat weak; it lists the number of steps rather than highlighting the key transformation phases. While the main features are identified, the description lacks detail in certain areas, such as the specific function of the centrifuge or the cooling process. The response addresses the requirements of the prompt, but the development of the information is basic. To reach a higher band, you should provide a more analytical overview that synthesizes the process rather than simply listing steps.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the process. You use some cohesive devices like 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'Finally' to signal the progression of the stages. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and the connection between sentences could be smoother. For example, the sentence 'Therefore, the last steps contribute to make sugar dry and cool' is slightly awkward in its logical flow. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate, and the information is sequenced in a way that is easy to follow, though the use of cohesive devices could be more varied and natural.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, with terms like 'cultivated', 'harvesting', 'crushing', and 'centrifuge' being used correctly. However, there are some inaccuracies and awkward phrasings, such as 'a process contain 7 crucial steps' (should be 'contains') and 'separates throw centrifuge' (should be 'separated through a centrifuge'). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic verbs. To improve, try to incorporate more precise technical collocations related to industrial processes and ensure that word forms are used correctly in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'the fine sugar crystals are gets separates' (incorrect passive voice and verb form) and 'collected juice need to heat' (should be 'needs to be heated'). Additionally, there are issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'in cultivated soil' and 'into crushing machine'. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on verb tenses and passive voice construction will significantly improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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