Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 4.5)

So as we know that sugar is one of the main things which we consume in our daily life but most of us not know that how and where from sugar is produced

So firstly the main thing is that sugar is produced from sugarcanes which are commonly used and available in villages and country sides places

So now the main question is how sugar is produced from sugar cane

I have a diagram in front of me in which the whole procedure of making of sugar from sugar cane is graphed

Usually sugarcanes takes 12 to 18 months for growing

After the complete growing of sugar canes the farmers have to harvest the sugar cane and then the procedure of crushing the sugarcane is began and they crush it and after crushing they get juice of sugarcane and then they have to purify the the juice and evaporate the juice in heat and after that they separate sugar crystals from synap and after that they dry and cool the sugar and thats how sugar is produced .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the requirements of an Academic Task 1 report. Instead of providing a formal summary of the process, the writing is conversational and includes irrelevant personal commentary, such as 'So as we know that sugar is one of the main things which we consume'. It lacks an overview of the process and fails to present the information in a professional, objective tone. While the steps are mentioned, they are presented as a narrative rather than a structured report. The response does not select and report main features effectively, and the lack of a formal structure significantly impacts the task achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response lacks logical paragraphing and structure. It is written as a single, informal block of text. The use of cohesive devices is repetitive and simplistic, relying heavily on 'So' and 'and then' to connect ideas. There is no clear progression of information, and the lack of formal transitions makes the text feel like a casual conversation rather than an academic report. The absence of an introduction, body, and conclusion structure makes it difficult to follow the logical flow of the manufacturing process.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very basic and repetitive, often using informal language unsuitable for an academic task. Phrases like 'main things', 'country sides places', and 'synap' (likely a misspelling of syrup) demonstrate a limited range. There is no attempt to use technical or precise vocabulary related to industrial processes, such as 'extraction', 'centrifugation', or 'crystallisation'. The word choice is consistently informal and lacks the precision required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The grammar is characterized by frequent errors and a lack of complex sentence structures. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('sugarcanes takes'), run-on sentences, and informal phrasing ('most of us not know that how'). Punctuation is largely absent, and the sentence construction is repetitive and simplistic. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of grammatical errors and the lack of variety in sentence structure prevent the response from reaching a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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