Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The illustration demonstrates the process of how sugar is being manufactured from sugar cane.

Overall, it can be seen that sugar cane passed through seven steps, beginning from growing sugar canes to drying and cooling sugar.

Firstly, sugar cane plants takes time to grow, for 12 to 18 months. It then harvested by men and tractor and put into lorry before crushing sugar canes in machine to make juice from it. Juice then gone through limestone filter for its purification.

After purifying, juice added into evaporator, where it turns in form of syrup, which is done by heat process under fire. In the seventh steps, centrifuge helps to separate sugar crystals from syrup, which puts in a container, where sugar are being dried and cooled down, resulting in production of sugar.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the overall task achievement. While the main stages of the process are identified, the description is quite brief and lacks the necessary detail to fully explain the transformation of sugar cane into sugar. For instance, the transition between the evaporator and the centrifuge is described in a very simplified manner. To improve, you should aim to expand on the technical stages, such as the specific role of the centrifuge or the cooling process, to ensure all parts of the diagram are fully developed and the length requirement is met.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the sequence of the process. You have used some cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'It then', and 'After purifying' to link the stages. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by awkward phrasing and repetitive sentence structures. The transition between the final steps is somewhat abrupt. To achieve a higher band, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that the progression between sentences is smoother, avoiding the mechanical feel of the current list-like approach.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate to describe the process, but it lacks the precision and variety expected for a higher band. You rely on basic verbs like 'make', 'put', and 'turns'. Phrases such as 'sugar cane plants takes time to grow' are simplistic. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'gone through' instead of 'undergoes'. To improve, incorporate more topic-specific terminology related to industrial processes, such as 'extraction', 'filtration', 'crystallization', and 'refinement', which would demonstrate a more sophisticated control of language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains several grammatical errors that affect the clarity of the writing. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'sugar cane plants takes', 'sugar are being dried') and article usage (e.g., 'in machine', 'in seventh steps'). The sentence structures are mostly simple or contain errors when attempting complexity, such as 'which is done by heat process under fire'. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Additionally, try to incorporate more complex sentence structures, such as passive voice constructions, which are essential for describing scientific or industrial processes.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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