Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-15
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 4.0)
the assigned process chart delineates information regarding that the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
overall, It is evident that the how suger is produced from sugar cane. total seven stages to make a suger cane. show the how to make suger cane.
In, first stage cultivating sugercan (12-18 months) and easily grow to furtilization. and next step harvesting the sugercane in labour and through the tractor and clean them . third step through into a crushing machin and put into sugercane and extract juice in big contaioner and collected them into next process.
fourth stage is go into purify juice in limestone filter and come into clean. next stage is put into a big container to heat them and evaporatpor ( juice become syrup ) throuh a high level of heat. next process is centrifuge is ( seprate sugar crystals from syrup ) and last step is drying and cooling and then making a suger to use and eat them in anyone.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5
The student attempts to outline the process of manufacturing sugar from sugar cane, noting the main stages from growing and harvesting through crushing, purifying, evaporating, and centrifuging to drying and cooling. However, the response falls short of fully satisfying the task requirements. The overview is extremely repetitive and ungrammatical (e.g., 'It is evident that the how suger is produced from sugar cane. total seven stages to make a suger cane. show the how to make suger cane'), failing to provide a clear, cohesive summary of the overall process. Furthermore, some details are slightly inaccurate or confused, such as mentioning 'furtilization' or stating that sugar is made for anyone to 'eat them'. This corresponds to a Band 4.5 or 5.0 level where the task is addressed only partially and ideas are limited or unclear.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text suffers from a severe lack of proper paragraphing, presented mostly as two block paragraphs with erratic line breaks. The logical progression is broken by repetitive introductory statements and disjointed transitions like 'In, first stage...' and 'next stage is...'. Cohesive devices are either missing, inadequate, or repetitive, making the flow difficult to follow. There is no clear overall organization, and referencing is faulty. This aligns with Band 4.0 descriptors, where information and ideas are not arranged coherently and paragraphing is absent or inadequate.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
Vocabulary is very basic, repetitive, and plagued by persistent spelling errors, such as 'suger', 'sugercan', 'sugerken', 'machin', 'contaioner', and 'evaporatpor'. The student attempts some less common vocabulary terms related to the process (e.g., 'cultivating', 'limestone filter', 'evaporator', 'centrifuge'), but misuse and spelling mistakes severely strain the reader's comprehension. There is a lack of control over word choice and collocation. This fits the Band 4 descriptors where basic, repetitive vocabulary and frequent errors impede communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The grammatical range is extremely limited, consisting mostly of fragmented or poorly constructed clauses rather than complete, well-formed sentences. There are frequent, heavy grammatical errors throughout the text, such as missing subjects and verbs (e.g., 'total seven stages to make a suger cane. show the how to make suger cane') and incorrect prepositions and verb forms (e.g., 'third stage through into a crushing machin and put into sugercane and extract juice'). Punctuation is also poorly handled, with multiple run-on constructions. This reflects Band 4 performance where errors are frequent and often distort meaning.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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