Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 4.0)
the following diagram show that how sugar can is produced.firslty,farmers put seed on land and take water regular and it growing between 12 to 18 months then people cut it and load it to on a tarcter morevover crushing in a machine and put their joice on a big botttle and purifying juice from limestone filter addtional it evaporator the juice convert into syrup there is a process which called centrifuge which divide sugar crystals from syrup however it will drying and colling as result it become sugar
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is severely under-length, containing only 88 words compared to the required minimum of 150 words. Because of this, the overview of the process is incomplete, and many stages of the diagram are only cursorily mentioned without adequate extension or comparison. The student outlines basic steps from growing to refining sugar, but fails to develop the information fully or provide a comprehensive summary of the entire linear process. As a result, Task Achievement is penalised for falling well short of the word count requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text is written as a single, continuous run-on sentence without any paragraph breaks or proper punctuation (such as periods between independent clauses). While transition words like 'firslty', 'morevover', 'addtional', and 'however' are attempted, they are used incorrectly or mechanically to string clauses together rather than to structure a coherent report. There is no clear logical organisation or progression, and the lack of basic sentence boundaries makes the overall arrangement difficult to follow.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive ('sugar', 'juice', 'machine'). There are numerous spelling errors throughout the text, including 'show' instead of 'shows', 'can' instead of 'cane', 'firslty', 'tarcter', 'morevover', 'joice', 'botttle', 'addtional', 'evaporator', 'colling', and 'result'. Less common vocabulary is attempted with severe inaccuracies in word choice and form, which noticeably strains the reader and restricts the lexical score to a band 4.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
Grammatical control is extremely weak. The entire response consists of a single run-on sentence joined by conjunctions and transitional adverbs without any terminal punctuation. There is a total lack of complex sentence structures used accurately, and basic verb forms are frequently incorrect, such as 'the following diagram show that how', 'it growing', and 'it will drying and colling'. Frequent, pervasive errors distort meaning and make the text difficult to read.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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