Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The diagram illustrate the manufacturing process suger from suger cane.suger is produced from suger cane by following process.

First of all we grow suger canes for 12 to 18 monthes..In second step we will harvest that suger canes. Then suger canes will crush into juice after that this juice will be purified with the help of limestonefilter. Then this juice will becomes syrup after evaporating. From this suger syrup crystals will be separated from syrup

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response fails to meet the minimum word length requirement of 150 words, containing only 75 words. Consequently, the description of the manufacturing process is severely under-developed. While the student identifies several key stages of the process, such as growing, harvesting, crushing, purifying, evaporating, and separating crystals via a centrifuge, the lack of detail and incomplete summary prevent a full overview of the diagram. Essential steps and alternative methods, such as the two harvesting techniques or the final cooling and drying phase, are entirely omitted. In accordance with IELTS assessment criteria for under-length responses, Task Achievement is heavily penalised due to the incomplete coverage and inadequate length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The text lacks proper paragraphing, presented as two brief blocks of text. While the writer attempts to use sequence markers such as 'First of all', 'In second step', and 'Then', the overall organisation is basic and lacks sophisticated cohesion. Referencing between sentences is at times repetitive, relying heavily on consecutive uses of 'Then this juice'. There is an absence of a clear introduction that paraphrases the prompt effectively, and the conclusion of the sequence trails off abruptly before the final stages of the diagram are reached. Logical progression is therefore hindered by the brevity and lack of structural control.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

Vocabulary is very limited and heavily repetitive, with frequent spelling errors throughout the text, most notably spelling 'sugar' as 'suger' and 'months' as 'monthes'. The student relies directly on terms from the prompt without demonstrating a flexible or wide lexical range. While basic process-related terms like 'harvest', 'crush', 'juice', 'limestone filter', and 'syrup' are attempted, the range is insufficient to achieve a higher score. Furthermore, word choice and collocation lack precision, and the numerous spelling mistakes detract from the overall quality of the lexical output.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response features a very limited range of grammatical structures, consisting mainly of simple sentences and basic active forms. There are noticeable grammatical errors, such as 'The diagram illustrate' (subject-verb agreement error), 'sugar canes will crush into juice' (passive voice misuse), and punctuation issues including missing spaces and double periods. Complex sentence forms are virtually absent. While basic meaning is partially communicated, the frequency of grammatical inaccuracies and the lack of structural variety restrict the score to this band.

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