Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The diagram gives information about manufacturing procedure for making sugar from sugar cane. In this essay, i will discuss all steps mentioned for formation of sugar.
Initially, sugar canes are planted and leave it for almost 12-18 months to grow it better. Then sugar cane is harvested by the farmers by using the harvesting machine. Furthermore, sugar cane is crushed by the crushing machine and it produces juice, then the juice is purified by using the limestone filter.
Meanwhile after purifying, the heat is given at extreme level to the juice which produces evaporation. As a result, the juice becomes in the form of syrup. After that, the centrifuge method is used to separate the sugar crystal which are found in a large amount and they are very small in size.
Eventually, the last step is drying the sugar and then it is left for cooling.
In conclusion, the sugar canes are used to produce fresh juice and to make brown sugar in many countries which is mostly used in the kitchens and in the restuarants and this process declares all steps that how to produce sugar from sugar canes.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The student successfully covers all stages of the sugar manufacturing process from the initial growing phase through to drying and cooling, as shown in the diagram. The main features are reported logically in chronological order. However, the response includes unnecessary commentary in the introduction and conclusion (such as 'In this essay, i will discuss' and personal opinions about where brown sugar is used in kitchens), which is characteristic of Task 2 essays rather than an objective Academic Task 1 summary. An overview is present, but it lacks a formal introductory summary sentence outlining the overall nature of the process (e.g., a linear, man-made process involving seven main stages). Because all essential visual data is addressed, the task is adequately fulfilled despite the structural framing issues.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The text is organized into logical paragraphs representing the introduction, body steps, and conclusion, providing a coherent overall arrangement. Cohesive devices are used to signal sequence, such as 'Initially', 'Then', 'Furthermore', 'Meanwhile after purifying', 'As a result', and 'Eventually'. However, some cohesive links feel slightly mechanical or are grammatically awkward, such as 'Meanwhile after purifying' and run-on structures like 'crushed by the crushing machine and it produces juice, then the juice is purified'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the integration of ideas could be smoother. Referencing is generally clear, allowing the reader to follow the progression of the manufacturing stages easily.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully employing process-specific terms such as 'harvested', 'crushed', 'limestone filter', 'evaporation', 'syrup', 'centrifuge', and 'crystals'. However, there are instances of unnatural word choice and repetition, such as 'manufacturing procedure for making' (redundant phrasing), 'leave it for almost 12-18 months to grow it better', and 'the juice becomes in the form of syrup'. Spelling is generally correct, but minor lexical inaccuracies prevent the vocabulary from reaching a higher band. A wider variety of less common synonyms would be needed for a Band 7.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including passive voice constructions like 'sugar cane is harvested' and 'the juice is purified'. However, grammatical errors and awkward phrasing are noticeable throughout, such as 'leave it for almost 12-18 months to grow it better' (incorrect pronoun reference and active/passive mismatch), 'the heat is given at extreme level' (awkward preposition and missing article), and lower-case 'i'. Punctuation is sometimes weak, leading to run-on sentences. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they occur frequently enough to typify Band 5 to Band 6 performance.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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