Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The diagram illustrates the how the process pf manufacturing for making sugar from the sugar cane.
Overall, there are several stages the process of making sugar from the sugar cane which is starting with growing a sugar cane around 12 to 18 month take and ending with drying and cooling sugar cane ready to selling.
To beggining with, sugar canes are planted its take a time around 12 to 18 month to growed. After growing, sugar canes are harvest by hand in a piece and collected helping by JCB and put in the vehicle (truck). The pieces sugar cane crush with crishing machine to made a juice.
After crushed a sugar canes the crushing sugar cane converted into a juice then juice was go on purifying with limestone filter. Moreover, after filtering the juice from sungar canes are heating in heat to became evaporator the juice beces syrup. The sugar canes separates the sugar with crystal from syrup a centrifuge. Eventually the sugar was drying and cooling. Ather dry and cool a smalls pieces which is sugar that is finally ready a sugar to selling and eating
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by outlining the main stages of sugar production from growing to selling. An overview is successfully attempted at the beginning, noting that the process starts with growing and ends with drying, cooling, and selling. However, certain parts of the process are under-developed or lack clarity, such as the description of the centrifuge and the specifics of harvesting. While the main features are highlighted, the explanation of individual steps is sometimes confusing, which keeps the response at this level. To move higher, the student should provide a clearer, more fully developed overview and ensure every stage of the diagram is described with precision and logical progression.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The text presents a coherent overall arrangement and follows the chronological sequence of the diagram. Paragraphing is attempted to separate the introduction, overview, and body details. However, cohesion is frequently mechanical and sometimes faulty. Transitional phrases like 'To beggining with' and 'After crushed a sugar canes' are awkwardly constructed, and referencing is occasionally unclear, making the logical flow somewhat bumpy. To achieve a higher band, the student needs to use cohesive devices more naturally and flexibly, ensuring smoother transitions between sentences and clearer overall progression without relying on repetitive connectors.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, with attempts to incorporate less common items related to the process, such as 'crushing', 'purifying', 'limestone filter', and 'centrifuge'. However, there are noticeable word-form and word-choice errors, alongside spelling mistakes throughout the text, including 'beggining', 'growed', 'crishing', 'made', 'sungar', 'became', 'beces', and 'smalls'. These errors and awkward collocations, such as 'ready a sugar to selling', occasionally impede communication. To improve, the student must expand their control of word forms and eliminate basic spelling and lexical errors through careful proofreading.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and some attempted complex sentence forms, but grammatical control is weak. There are frequent errors in verb tenses, articles, word order, and sentence structure, such as 'illustrates the how the process pf manufacturing', 'sugar canes are harvest', 'its take a time', and 'juice was go on purifying'. These errors persist throughout the text, although they rarely completely obscure the core meaning of the process. To reach a higher band, the student needs to demonstrate better control over basic sentence structures, subject-verb agreement, and passive voice constructions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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