Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrates the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Overall, it is clear that the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

At first, we will discuss about how sugar is produced from sugar cane.The first step is growing the sugar canes the sugar canes are ripe almost 12-18 months. Later, the second step is harvesting the canes and load in the vehicle trunk.

The third and fourth step is crushing the sugar canes by machine and get the purifying juice by limestone filter machine.Then, we will give heat to purifying juice whenever purifying juice will not evaporate.

The sixth step is centrifuge we will separate the sugar crystals from syrup then drying it and give cooling.

The final step is the seventh step we will drying the sugar crystals and givve the cooling then the sugar are totally ready.

Subsequently, the workers will pack the sugar and sale to the market with a own price labels.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response only partially addresses the task requirements. First, it fails to meet the minimum length requirement, falling short of the 150-word count with several words copied directly from the prompt. While the student attempts to outline the stages of sugar production from growing to cooling, the information is presented in a mechanical, list-like manner rather than a well-synthesized summary. There is no clear overview, and the introduction features an irrelevant meta-statement ('it is clear that the information by selecting and reporting the main features'). Furthermore, the conclusion introduces outside information not found in the diagram, such as workers packing the sugar and selling it with price labels. To improve, the writer needs to write a longer response, provide a clear overall summary of the main stages, and stick strictly to the visual data presented without adding speculative details.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organization with sequential markers like 'At first', 'The third and fourth step', and 'The final step', but the response lacks a clear overall progression and logical flow. Paragraphing is poor, as the text is clumped together into a single block of text rather than being divided into a logical introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or repetitive, such as starting multiple sentences with references to 'step'. Additionally, the referencing is not always clear, leading to abrupt transitions between sentences, such as jumping from the evaporator directly to the centrifuge without smooth connecting phrases. To achieve a higher band, the writer should use proper paragraph breaks and employ a wider, more natural variety of cohesive links to guide the reader smoothly through the stages of the process.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The lexical resource used is limited and barely adequate for the task. The student relies on basic, repetitive vocabulary, frequently misusing words or word forms, such as writing 'purifying juice' instead of 'purified juice' or 'juice being purified', and 'givve the cooling' instead of 'cooling process'. There are also lexical inaccuracies and awkward collocations like 'load in the vehicle trunk' and 'sale to the market with a own price labels'. Spelling errors, such as 'givve', further detract from the quality of the writing. While some process-related vocabulary is attempted, the frequent errors in word choice and form restrict the clarity of the response. To progress, the writer must expand their vocabulary related to industrial processes and focus on accurate word forms and standard collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The grammatical range is quite limited, consisting mostly of simple and attempted complex sentence structures that are frequently faulty. There are numerous grammatical errors throughout the text, including tense confusion ('we will discuss about', 'whenever purifying juice will not evaporate'), missing articles, and awkward phrasing that impacts readability. For instance, 'the sugar canes are ripe almost 12-18 months' lacks proper prepositions and verb agreement. Frequent errors in prepositions, verb patterns, and punctuation cause noticeable difficulty for the reader. To reach a higher band, the writer needs to demonstrate a greater variety of complex structures with improved accuracy, paying closer attention to verb tenses appropriate for describing a scientific or industrial process.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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