Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given diagram shows the process of making sugar.lets analyse how different steps are involved in making sugar.

We see farmers grow sugar cane for about 16 to 18 months.Then comes the procedure of harvesting.After harvesting the sugar canes are brougt to mills and factories in tractors.From here start the main step of making sugar.Sugar canes are put in machines to extract juice.Then comes the process of purification of juice .For this purpose limestone filter is used.Then this juice is heated and it becomes syrup after evaporation.Then crystals are separated from this syrup .This process is called centrifuge.Sugar is gained after drying and coolong this syrup.This is the final process when we get sugar in its real form.

We see about 7 to 8 steps are involved in making sugar.The steps are simple but time taking.It involves the struggle of man and machines through which we get sugar for daily use.These steps are important and provide a detailed picture and clear the concept of people and students about manufacturing of sugar.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the main task by outlining the stages of sugar production from sugar cane, but it does so only partially. While the student identifies most steps shown in the diagram such as growing, harvesting, crushing, purifying, evaporating, and centrifuging, some parts of the process are underdeveloped or presented in a somewhat colloquial and repetitive manner. For instance, the final concluding sentences do not add new information or properly summarise the core visual data, instead offering meta-commentary like "This is the final process when we get sugar in its real form." To reach a higher level, the writer needs to provide a more cohesive overview of the entire linear process without relying on unnecessary commentary, ensuring all key stages are clearly linked and fully highlighted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The text demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear sequence following the steps in the diagram. Basic cohesive devices and transition words like "Then", "After harvesting", and "From here" are used to guide the reader through the stages. However, the paragraphing is quite weak, as the entire core process and extraneous commentary are crammed into a single block of text rather than being logically grouped into introductory, developmental, and concluding paragraphs. Referencing is occasionally mechanical, and the lack of a clear paragraph structure limits the progression of ideas. To improve, the writer should organise the response into distinct paragraphs with a wider variety of cohesive devices to manage the flow of information more naturally.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully conveying basic procedural actions such as "grow", "harvest", "crush", and "heat". However, the range is limited, and there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors that detract from the quality, such as "lets analyse", "brougt", and "coolong". The student attempts some less common vocabulary like "purification", "evaporation", and "centrifuge", but overall expression remains simple and repetitive. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to incorporate a wider range of precise lexical items and collocation patterns specific to process diagrams, while eliminating basic spelling errors and conversational phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response displays a limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and basic active forms. While there are some attempts at complex sentences, control over grammar and punctuation is inconsistent. There are several punctuation and spacing errors, such as missing spaces after periods (e.g., "months.Then comes", "juice .For this"), and minor subject-verb agreement or article issues. Frequent errors and repetitive structures mean the text does not fully establish the control needed for higher bands. To improve, the writer should incorporate a greater variety of complex grammatical structures, particularly passive voice constructions which are standard for describing manufacturing processes, while carefully checking punctuation and spacing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.