Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Sugar is essential for our diet , as it contains carbohydrates , little amount of protein and fats which provide energy . However , sugar is produced by sugarcanes which grows on the fertile and moist soil and It takes 12-18 months to grow broader and elongate . After growing properly , it is harvested by farmers which takes a lot of time and efforts or by using machines such as , tractors , filled in trucks and take it to the factories where the crushing of sugarcane occur which convert it into thick liquid paste or juice . After crushing , it is purified in the limestone filter which removes dust particles and microorganisms then move toward the evaporator to make syrup from juice . After that , it undergoes centrifuge process which assist to separate sugar large crystals from syrup , but the sugar is still wet and hot so it goes into drying bin to dry it and cool it before packing .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You cover the main sequence from growing sugar cane through harvesting, crushing, purification, evaporation, centrifuging, and drying/cooling, and you correctly include the 12–18-month growing period and the two harvesting methods. However, the response only partially fulfils the diagram-summary task because it lacks a clear overview of the process as a whole and adds unsupported details, such as sugar cane growing on “fertile and moist soil,” transport in “filled in trucks,” and the filter removing microorganisms. The opening discussion of sugar’s nutritional value is also not relevant to describing the process. Focus on the stages and their order, and summarise the overall transformation from cane to sugar without adding information not shown.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The stages are generally presented in the correct order, and linking expressions such as “After growing properly,” “After crushing,” and “After that” help the reader follow the process. However, the response is written as one long paragraph and relies heavily on a chain of connectors, so the progression feels mechanical rather than clearly organised. The opening sentence about nutrition interrupts the process description, while the final clause about packing introduces a step not shown in the diagram. Use a brief introduction and overview, then group the stages into a logical sequence. Clearer sentence boundaries and more varied referencing would make the relationships between stages easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “harvested,” “crushing,” “limestone filter,” “evaporator,” “syrup,” and “centrifuge,” which allows the reader to understand the main stages. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “grow broader and elongate,” “thick liquid paste,” “large crystals,” and “drying bin.” “Sugarcanes” is also better written as “sugar cane” in this context. Some added terms, including “microorganisms,” do not come from the diagram and reduce precision. Aim for concise, standard process language, such as “the cane is crushed to extract juice” and “the crystals are dried and cooled.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts to connect several stages using subordinate clauses and sequencing phrases, but it relies on a long, loosely joined sentence structure, and errors are frequent enough to make parts difficult to read. Examples include “sugarcanes which grows,” where the verb does not agree with its subject, and “the crushing of sugarcane occur,” which also has an agreement error. The phrase “which convert it” has an unclear reference and incorrect verb form, while “then move toward the evaporator” lacks a clear subject. Punctuation spacing is also inconsistent. Use shorter sentences with a clear subject and verb for each stage, and check agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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