Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The diagram below display the companies how making the sugar from suger cane.

There are six steps.

To start, first of all the farmers are suger canes growing in plant. The sugar canes are growing for 12 to 18 months.Then the sugar canes are cuts for harvesting machine. The thrid step is that, the suger canes are put the crusher then the sugar canes are crushingand make the juice.After this process,the juice are purifyed with limestone.The fifth step is that the filtered juice put the evaporator and the jucie become syrup then the syrup are cooked on heat.After this process then sixth step is started then the sugar crystals are separates from syrup.The seven and last step is that the sugar are put in drum. When the sugar add the drum then the sugar are dryed after drying sugar then it is cooled. The sugar are cooked from sugar canes.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the process as sugar production from sugar cane and include several key stages, including the 12–18-month growing period, crushing, purification, evaporation, separation of crystals, and drying and cooling. However, the account is not fully accurate or clear: the diagram shows two harvesting methods, mechanical and manual, but you mention only a harvesting machine. You also say there are six steps, then describe seven, and the final overview-like sentence, “The sugar are cooked from sugar canes,” is inaccurate. Some stages are difficult to interpret, so the main features are only partially reported. To improve, give a concise overview of the complete sequence and describe each stage precisely, without adding unsupported details such as cooking the finished sugar.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The stages are presented in roughly the correct order, and sequencing phrases such as “To start,” “After this process,” and “the seven and last step” help the reader follow the process. This gives the response some organisation. However, the writing is largely one continuous paragraph, and the repeated transitions make the progression mechanical rather than smooth. The opening claim of six steps also conflicts with the later description of seven, which disrupts the overall flow. Several sentences run together without adequate spacing or punctuation, making the links between actions unclear. Group the stages into a short introduction/overview and a logically organised process description, and use a wider range of accurate linking expressions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “limestone,” “evaporator,” “syrup,” and “sugar crystals,” which helps convey the subject. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand, such as “suger,” “thrid,” “purifyed,” and “jucie.” Some expressions are also unnatural or imprecise: “the companies how making” and “put the crusher” do not clearly describe the process. Aim to use accurate process verbs and collocations, such as “is harvested,” “is crushed,” and “is filtered through limestone.” Proofreading spelling and choosing precise terms for each stage would make the description clearer and more appropriate for an academic report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to describe a sequence using both simple sentences and longer clauses, but grammatical control is weak and errors frequently affect clarity. For example, “the farmers are suger canes growing in plant” has an unclear subject and incorrect verb construction, while “the juice are purifyed” and “the sugar crystals are separates” show problems with agreement and passive verb forms. Articles and sentence boundaries are also often missing or inaccurate, as in “put the evaporator” and the run-on sequence beginning “After this process then sixth step is started.” Use consistent present simple passive forms for the process—for example, “The canes are crushed” and “The juice is purified”—and check subject–verb agreement, articles, and punctuation. Shorter, correctly formed sentences would improve accuracy.

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