Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The digram ilustrates the process of making sugar from sugar cane.

firstly, sugar cane is planted in winters and people grow it, this process can take 1 to 15 years. Next process is harvesting, in many countries people usually harvest it by their own or with the help of a harvestor because it saves a lot of tim.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify the topic and begin describing the first two stages, including the two harvesting methods. However, the response covers only a small part of the process: crushing, purification, evaporation, centrifuging, and drying/cooling are all omitted, and there is no overview of the process as a whole. The growing period is also misreported: the diagram gives 12–18 months, not “1 to 15 years,” and it does not say that cane is planted in winter. The response is 58 words, below the required 150, which leaves the task substantially incomplete. To improve, report the full sequence, give an accurate overview, and include only details supported by the diagram.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic chronological start: “firstly” introduces growing and “Next process” moves to harvesting. This gives the reader a simple sense of sequence, but the account stops before the remaining stages, so there is no progression through the complete process or concluding stage. The opening and the two stage descriptions are also placed in one short paragraph, with little development or linking between details. Build a clear overview paragraph followed by a logically ordered description of the stages, using links such as “after harvesting,” “the resulting juice,” and “finally” to show how each step connects.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use relevant process vocabulary such as “harvesting,” “harvestor,” and “sugar cane,” and the meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is very limited because the response describes only two stages, and several spelling errors reduce accuracy: “digram,” “ilustrates,” and “tim.” “Harvestor” is also not the standard spelling; use “harvester.” Some phrasing is imprecise for a process description, such as “people grow it” and “by their own.” Expand the vocabulary to name the later stages and their outputs—for example, “crush,” “filter,” “syrup,” and “sugar crystals”—and check spelling and natural collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response communicates a few basic ideas using simple clauses and one longer sentence joined by “because.” There is some control of basic sentence structure, but the range is narrow and several grammatical choices need correction. “Firstly” should begin with a capital letter after the full stop, and “Next process is harvesting” needs an article or a different construction, such as “The next stage is harvesting.” The phrase “people usually harvest it by their own” should be “people usually harvest it themselves.” The sentence about growing also shifts awkwardly between passive planting and “people grow it.” Use consistent present simple forms to describe the process and vary sentence structures as you explain each stage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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