Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The diagram illustrate the manufacturing for making sugar from sugar cane.

Overall, it is clear that the diagrams are shows the seven stages for the process of making sugar from sugar cane.First the diagram sugar canes growing to 12-18 months.Second step,Harvesting the man cutting to the sugar canes in different pices then load the dumper.Aftar that the suger canes move to the crushing mechine then sugar canes reduse the juice.Aftar that juice moving on purifying juice move the limestone filter and reduce the one drop to the next step Evaporator juice becomes syrup and juice move on the link and heat observe.After that the next step centrifuge the separates sugar crystals from syrup around the cicular shape mechine and mixed the well.finally,the last step drying and cooling crystals from syrup move on the large drum drying and cooling then made the sugar in white color and made the sugar is ready.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the process as having seven stages and include the key sequence from growing through harvesting, crushing, purification, evaporation, centrifuging, and drying. The overview also signals that sugar is the final product. However, several details are unclear or inaccurate: the diagram shows two harvesting methods, but your account focuses on a man cutting the cane and loading a dumper; it does not show a dumper. The crushing stage produces juice, while your wording says the canes “reduce the juice.” The final product is labelled sugar, but “white color” is not stated. To make the report more complete and precise, describe the two harvesting methods and explain the main transformation at each stage using only information shown in the diagram.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response follows the process in broadly the correct order, and sequencing expressions such as “First,” “After that,” and “Finally” help the reader track the stages. The opening and overview also establish the topic. However, the account is presented as one long paragraph, and the repeated “After that” makes the progression mechanical. Several links between stages are difficult to follow, particularly the sentence about the evaporator, heat, and the “link,” and the final sentence combines drying, cooling, and the product without clear relationships. Use separate paragraphs for the introduction/overview and process details, and make each sentence describe one or two connected stages. Clearer references to the juice, syrup, and crystals would also improve cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “harvesting,” “crushing,” “limestone filter,” “evaporator,” “centrifuge,” and “drying and cooling.” These terms show awareness of the diagram’s stages. However, the range is limited and several word choices or spellings make the meaning difficult to interpret, such as “different pices,” “dumper,” “observe,” and “mixed the well.” Some phrases are also imprecise: “reduce the one drop” does not clearly describe purification, and “made the sugar in white color” is not a natural way to report the final stage. Aim for accurate process verbs and collocations, such as “extracts juice,” “is heated,” and “sugar crystals are separated.” Check spelling carefully, especially for technical terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to describe a sequence and to use a passive form in “juice becomes syrup,” but most sentences rely on simple structures, and errors are frequent enough to make several relationships unclear. For example, “The diagram illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, while “the diagrams are shows” combines incompatible verb forms. The sentence beginning “First the diagram sugar canes growing” lacks a clear grammatical structure, and “the next step centrifuge the separates” has an unclear subject and verb pattern. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after full stops and commas. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use consistent present simple or passive forms, for example, “The cane is crushed, and the juice is collected.”

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