Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The diagram illustrates the manufacturing process for produceing suger from suger cane .

Overall, it is clear that the manufacturing of suger produce contain seven different steps including from growing suger cane to dry and cooling the suger .

Initially , farmers plant suger cane and suger cane need 12 to 18 month for fully matured . After that farmer harvest the suger cane by manual as well as machine can also hervest . Then in 3rd steps suger cane throughout in a crushing machine , where the juice are apart from the cane and collected for making suger . In the 4th steps , juice are purifyied by a limestone filter .

Then in fifth steps , juice are pour into a container , where its heated and evaporate , while the juice becomes converted into thick syrup . After that the syrup transfered into a machine call centrifuge where the suger separates from syrup . At the end of the process crystals suger transfered into a dry and cooling chember where its dried and perfect for pakges .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You cover the main stages in the correct order, from growing and harvesting through crushing, purification, evaporation, centrifuging, and drying. The overview identifies seven steps and the process’s starting and ending points, while details such as the 12–18-month growing period and the two harvesting methods are accurately reported. This gives the response a clear account of the process. Some details are less fully or precisely described: for example, the crusher separates juice from the cane, and the centrifuge separates sugar crystals from syrup, but the final stage is described as making the sugar “perfect for pakges,” which adds an unsupported claim. To strengthen the response further, keep the description strictly factual and make the overview capture the key transformation from cane to sugar.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction and overview are followed by the early stages and then the later stages. Sequencing expressions such as “Initially,” “After that,” “Then,” and “At the end” help the reader follow the process. The paragraph break also separates the overview from the detailed account. However, the linking is somewhat mechanical, with several stages introduced by similar time-order phrases, and the long second paragraph groups many steps together. Some references are not fully clear, as in “where its heated and evaporate,” where the pronoun’s reference and the relationship between the actions are difficult to follow. Use clearer sentence boundaries and vary transitions by showing process relationships, not just sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant process vocabulary, including “harvest,” “crushing machine,” “limestone filter,” “syrup,” and “centrifuge,” so the reader can identify most stages. However, the range and control are limited by repeated use of “suger” and “suger cane,” as well as noticeable spelling errors such as “produceing,” “hervest,” “purifyied,” and “pakges.” Some word combinations are also unnatural, including “suger cane throughout in a crushing machine” and “dry and cooling chember.” These choices sometimes make the process harder to understand, even though the intended meaning is generally recoverable. Build accuracy with standard process collocations such as “feed the cane into a crusher” and “the crystals are dried and cooled,” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a relative clause in “a crushing machine, where…” and a contrastive structure with “while.” The sequence is generally understandable, but grammatical errors occur frequently and sometimes make relationships between actions unclear. Examples include “farmers plant suger cane and suger cane need,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “juice are pour,” which has an incorrect passive form. Articles and sentence construction also need attention: “in 3rd steps” and “in fifth steps” are not well formed, while “where its heated and evaporate” combines an unclear pronoun with inconsistent verb forms. Practise consistent past or present passive forms for process descriptions, such as “the juice is heated” and “the crystals are separated,” and check agreement and sentence boundaries.

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