Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given picture has illustrated the processing of making sugar from the raw post harvested sugar cane.

Overall, all the sewen mentioned steps are critical and important ones to produce the best quality sugar.

In the first step, preharvesting sathe of the sugar cane crop and it total duration to preoare has been shown, then harvesting of the crop by using latest machinery has been explored after that the third step in which the juice is exratcted through the crusher machine has been done by using the crushing of the sugar cane stem. Moreover, the filtration of the extracted juice purified by using Limestone filter, afterward the filtered juice then converted into the syrup by heat-up the juice poured in the evaporator. Ultimately the new form of the raw product then converted into a centrifuge to separet the crystals of sugar made in the due process and finally the drying and cooling of these srystals done to get the final shape of the sugar ready to present in the market for the normal usage.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the process as sugar production and include several central stages, including harvesting, crushing, filtering, evaporation, centrifuging, and drying. However, the account is only partially complete: the overview says the steps are “critical and important” rather than summarising the process’s overall progression from growing cane to finished sugar. You also omit the stated growing period of 12–18 months and mention only mechanical harvesting, although the diagram shows both mechanical and manual methods. Some stage descriptions are unclear, particularly the account of the centrifuge and the separation of crystals from syrup. To strengthen the response, give a concise overview and report the key details accurately, including both harvesting methods and the growing duration.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response follows the diagram’s general sequence, and linking expressions such as “after that,” “Moreover,” and “finally” help the reader follow the stages. This gives the account a coherent overall arrangement. However, most of the process is compressed into one long paragraph and a single extended sentence, so the relationships between stages are not always easy to follow. The repeated use of “then” and “afterward” also makes cohesion somewhat mechanical. The opening and overview are separated, but the body would be clearer if the stages were grouped into shorter sentences, with a distinct overview and a logical progression from cultivation and harvesting through processing to the final product.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “crusher,” “Limestone filter,” “evaporator,” “centrifuge,” and “crystals,” which helps convey the subject. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “extracted juice” and “final product.” However, inaccurate spelling and word choice are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning difficult to interpret: “sewen,” “preoare,” “exratcted,” and “separet” appear, while “raw post harvested sugar cane” and “final shape of the sugar” are awkward or imprecise. Some phrases, such as “ready to present in the market,” are not natural descriptions of the diagram. Use precise process terms and check spelling and collocations so that the technical stages are communicated clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt complex sentence structures and use sequencing clauses to connect stages, but control is inconsistent. The long sentence beginning “In the first step” contains several clauses joined without clear punctuation, making the relationships between actions difficult to follow. Verb forms and sentence patterns are also faulty in phrases such as “the filtration of the extracted juice purified” and “the drying and cooling of these crystals done.” Articles and prepositions are sometimes missing or awkward, as in “converted into a centrifuge.” These errors can make parts of the process hard to understand. Improve accuracy by using shorter sentences, ensuring each clause has a clear subject and verb, and checking tense and passive forms—for example, “the juice is purified” and “the crystals are dried and cooled.”

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