Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The sugar produced from the sugar canes the suger canes growing .The farmar can hard work can the growing the sugar canes .The sugar canes will be ready for 12 to 18 months ready for sugar canes .The farmar can hardwork will the sugar canes after18 months for ready the sugar canes .

The farmar was ready cut for sugar canes . That the sugar canes that harvesting and second hand cutt for sugae canes one day hardwork that the harvesting for sugar canes .The sugar canes harvesting and ready for crushing .

That the all sugar canes ready for crushing the farmar was veay hardwork that the 45 mints that the crushing the sugar canes and crush for all sugar canes and ready for purifying juice .The farmar for crushing the all sugar canes and ready for juice .

The juice was purifying juice limestone filter yhat the juice becomes syrup and heat .

Centrifuge and the drying and cooling the suger will be ready .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several relevant stages, including growing, harvesting, crushing, purifying, and the final drying and cooling, and you correctly mention the 12–18-month growing period. However, the process is only minimally described: there is no clear overview of the complete sequence, and key details are missing or unclear, such as the limestone filter, the change from juice to syrup through heating, and the centrifuge’s separation of sugar crystals from syrup. The claim that crushing takes “45 mints” is not shown in the diagram, while the two harvesting methods are only vaguely described. To improve, give a concise overview first, then report each stage accurately and avoid adding unsupported details.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response follows a broadly sensible order, moving from growing and harvesting through crushing to the later processing stages. This gives the reader some sense of progression, and repeated references to sugar cane help maintain the topic. However, the ideas are not separated into clear paragraphs, and many sentences run together or repeat information, for example the repeated statements that the canes are ready for crushing. Linking words such as “second” and “and” do not always clarify how stages relate. Use one paragraph for the overview and another for the sequence, and connect stages with precise transitions such as “after harvesting” and “the resulting juice is then filtered.”

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “harvesting,” “crushing,” “limestone filter,” “syrup,” and “centrifuge,” which shows awareness of the process. However, the range is basic and highly repetitive, especially the repeated use of “sugar canes” and “ready.” Several spelling errors, including “suger,” “farmar,” and “purifiying,” make the description harder to follow, while phrases such as “hard work” do not accurately describe the diagram’s stages. Aim for precise process vocabulary and avoid repeating the same noun where a clear reference is possible. For example, describe the cane being “cut” and the juice being “filtered” rather than relying on general or unclear wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response attempts to describe a sequence, but sentence structures are very limited and frequent errors often obscure the intended meaning. Examples include “The sugar produced from the sugar canes the suger canes growing” and “The juice was purifying juice limestone filter,” where clauses lack clear grammatical relationships. Verb forms and agreement are also unreliable, as in “the sugar canes will be ready” and “the farmar was ready cut.” Punctuation and sentence boundaries are inconsistent, with several ideas joined without full stops. Practise building clear simple sentences first, using a consistent present tense for process descriptions: “The cane is harvested and then crushed.” Add more complex structures only when their grammar is secure.

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