Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The diagram illustrates that manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane starts by growing the sugar canes for 12-18 months by giving them water and sun light thats the first step of the process. Then there are two ways of harvesting that cooked sugar cane, first is to use the harvesting machine or tractor to harvest the crop. Another way is to manually do it by hands harvest each sugar cane at a time it will take way more time but it just depends on the budget. After that crushing of sugar canes comes into the form of juice from sugar cane crushing machine, also u can drink that suagr cane juice too but we need to make sugar so we wont do that. 4th step is to purify that juice take all the dust particles out with the help of limestone filter. Now evaporate the juice by heating it in some type of chamber so the juice will transform itno syrup. Second last step is to centrifuge the syrup so it will seperate the sugar particles or crystals from syrup. Lastly take the particles in a drum and do the drying and cooling part so you will get oure sugar out of it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You cover the main sequence, including the 12–18-month growing period, the two harvesting methods, crushing, purification, evaporation, centrifuging, and final drying and cooling. However, the response does not provide a clear, concise overview of the process as a whole, and several details are added that are not shown: giving the cane water and sunlight, harvesting “depending on the budget,” drinking the juice, and removing “all the dust particles.” The diagram shows a limestone filter but does not specify its exact function in those terms. Some stages are described imprecisely, such as saying the crystals are “particles.” Focus on the diagram’s key transformations and avoid personal comments or unsupported explanations to make the summary more complete and objective.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The stages are generally presented in the correct order, and sequencing expressions such as “Then,” “After that,” “Second last,” and “Lastly” help the reader follow the process. However, the response is written as one long paragraph, with several stages joined into extended sentences, so the progression is not clearly signposted. Some transitions also lead into irrelevant asides—for example, the comment about drinking the juice interrupts the explanation of crushing. Use a brief overview followed by logically grouped stages, and connect each step directly to the next. More controlled sentence boundaries and less reliance on basic sequencing phrases would make the organisation clearer and reduce the impression of a running commentary.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant process vocabulary, including “harvesting,” “crushing,” “limestone filter,” “evaporate,” “syrup,” and “centrifuge,” which allows the main stages to be identified. However, the range is limited and some choices are informal or imprecise for an academic process description. Phrases such as “do it by hands,” “some type of chamber,” and “particles” are less precise than the diagram’s terminology; “pure sugar” is also misspelled as “oure.” There are further spelling errors in “suagr,” “itno,” and “seperate.” Aim for accurate technical terms and neutral wording, such as “harvest manually,” “heated container,” and “sugar crystals.” Avoid conversational expressions and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts to combine stages using clauses, as in “After that crushing of sugar canes comes into the form of juice,” but sentence structures are often faulty or incomplete, and the range remains limited. For example, “The diagram illustrates that manufacturing process” has an incorrect construction, while “Now evaporate the juice by heating it” shifts into an instruction rather than describing the process. The sentence beginning “Another way is to manually do it” becomes difficult to follow because clauses are joined without clear grammatical control. Use consistent present simple passive forms, such as “The juice is then heated,” and check articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries. Shorter, complete sentences would improve accuracy and clarity.

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