Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The diagram illustrates the manufacturing process for making sugar start from cultivation of sugar canes in land, ending with making sugar.

Overall, it is clear that the diagram account the process start from growing the sugar can crushing and create a juice and make a pure sugar at the end.

On the one hand, the beginning farmers cultivated the sugar canes in land, and wait for 12 to 18 weeks, whereas its grows the farmer start the cutting, and harvesting the sugar canes through physically and use tracker for cutting. Furthermore, then shift to the next stage crushing the sugar canes and produce the juice from the sugar canes plants. while fourth stage purifying juice for further process.

On the other hand, the juice dropping to evaporator and give a heat for boiling, to remove the dusts, after that transfer to next step centrifuge to distributes sugar crystals from syrup. finally drying and cooling the solution and converted to simple sugar then pack it transfer to market for selling.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You cover the main stages from cultivation through processing to the final sugar, and you include the growing period and both harvesting methods. The overview also identifies the process’s start and end, which helps address the task. However, some details are inaccurate or unsupported: the diagram gives 12–18 months, not weeks, and it does not show sugar being packed or sent to market. The explanation of purification is brief, and the overview’s claim that the process makes “a pure sugar” is unclear. To strengthen the response, report the stages precisely and focus on what the diagram shows, especially the change from juice to syrup and the separation of crystals before drying and cooling.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has an overall sequence and is divided into an introduction, an overview, and two body sections. Phrases such as “Furthermore,” “after that,” and “finally” help signal progression. However, “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” suggest a contrast, although the process is a single sequence, and some links between stages are awkward or unclear. For example, “while fourth stage purifying juice” does not form a complete transition, and the final sentence combines several actions without clear separation. Organise the body in chronological order and use straightforward stage links such as “Next” and “After purification” to make the progression more natural and precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant process vocabulary, including “cultivated,” “harvesting,” “crushing,” “evaporator,” and “centrifuge,” so the reader can identify the main operations. There are also attempts at more specific terms, such as “sugar crystals” and “syrup.” However, several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear: “tracker” for the harvesting machine, “distributes” for separating crystals, and “simple sugar” for the final product. “Dusts” is also not supported by the diagram’s description of purification. Aim for precise process verbs and natural combinations, such as “a tractor-mounted harvester,” “separates crystals from syrup,” and “the resulting sugar.” This would improve clarity without requiring more elaborate vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a comparison with “whereas” and a sequence introduced by “after that.” However, some grammatical errors make parts of the process difficult to follow. For example, “the diagram account the process start” has problems with subject–verb agreement and verb form, while “wait for 12 to 18 weeks” does not fit the sentence structure. The clause “while fourth stage purifying juice” is incomplete, and the final sentence shifts between verb forms (“drying and cooling … and converted”). Use complete clauses with consistent tense, for example, “The juice is purified before it is heated in an evaporator.” Check articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries when revising.

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