Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.0)

First they grew crops of sugarcane which takes almost 12_18 months of time and then harvest the crops with heavy machinery. afterwards the place the sugarcane in the crashing machine from which its juice is separated from itand then use a lemonstone fillter to purify the sugarcane juice After purifying they place the juice into the evaporator and geat it until the juice become a syrp . Now they put this syrp itno the centrifugation machine to separate crystals from it. in the end they let the syrp to cool and dry . now the dried and cooled syrp in pur sugar

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the main stages in the correct general order, from growing and harvesting through crushing, purification, evaporation, centrifuging, and drying. You also include the growing period and explain that the centrifuge separates crystals. However, the response is only 102 words, below the required 150, and this limits how fully you can report the process. There is no clear overview of the process as a whole, and some details are inaccurate: the diagram shows harvesting by both machine and hand, while you mention only machinery; at the end, sugar crystals are dried and cooled, not syrup. Develop a concise overview and describe the key inputs and outputs at each stage more accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The stages are mostly presented in process order, and sequencing words such as “First,” “afterwards,” “After purifying,” and “in the end” help the reader follow the sequence. This gives the response some organisation. However, it is written as one continuous block, and the transitions are sometimes awkward or unclear, particularly “Now they put this syrp itno the centrifugation machine.” Several stages are joined without clear sentence boundaries, making the progression harder to follow. Use separate sentences or paragraphs for the growing and processing stages, and connect them with accurate, varied transitions such as “Next” and “Finally.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “harvest,” “purify,” “evaporator,” and “centrifugation machine,” so the reader can recognise the general subject. However, the range is limited and several spelling or word-choice errors make the description less clear: “crashing machine” for “crushing machine,” “lemonstone fillter” for “limestone filter,” and “syrp” for “syrup.” The final phrase “in pur sugar” is also difficult to interpret. Aim for accurate technical terms and avoid repeating “juice” and “syrup” without clarifying what changes at each stage. Proofreading spellings and using precise process vocabulary would make the account easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to link stages into longer sentences, for example with “which” and “after,” but most structures are simple and several sentences are incomplete or difficult to parse. Verb forms and agreement are inconsistent: “they grew … and then harvest” shifts tense, while “the juice become a syrp” lacks the correct verb form. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also unreliable, as in the long sequence beginning “afterwards the place the sugarcane…”. These errors sometimes obscure the relationships between steps. Use the present simple consistently for a process, check subject–verb agreement, and punctuate each stage as a complete sentence. A few accurate complex sentences can then add variety.

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