Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The diagrm illustrate the produceding process for making sugar from sugar cane.

overall,the process pf sugar cane is consist on 7 stages. which start from growing seeds with the help of workers and complete with the ending stage is

drying and cooling

The process of sugar cane is consist on seven stage.it firstly, it has been growing in fields with the help of workers.it has been ready in 12 to 18 months in the form of sugar cane.next process is start harvesting with the help of workers and machines.after that it bringto curshing for machines. it come into the form of juice the next procress is goes to limestone filter where come the form of purfiying juice. next stagejuices comes to the form of evaporater juice become a syrup which is heated and contrifuge seprate the crystals into the syrup,another stage come where drying and cooling and this convert into the form of crystaline form in sugar whears, it packs and supplyto markets.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the process as having seven stages and give a relevant overview from growing sugar cane to drying and cooling. Most of the main stages are included in sequence, including harvesting, crushing, filtering, evaporation and centrifuging. However, some details are inaccurate or unsupported: the diagram does not show workers helping the cane grow, nor does it show sugar being packed or supplied to markets. The final product is sugar, but describing it as “crystalline form” is unclear. The overview also does not clearly summarise the key transformation from cane to juice, syrup and sugar. To strengthen the response, report only what the diagram shows and make that sequence of transformations explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response follows the general order of the process, and sequencing expressions such as “next process,” “after that” and “next stage” help the reader recognise the stages. The opening overview also gives the reader a basic framework. However, the writing is presented as one continuous block, and the repeated statements that the process “is consist” and has seven stages interrupt progression. Several transitions are awkward or unclear, particularly the long sentence beginning “next stage juices comes” that combines evaporation, heating and centrifuging. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and process details, and give each stage a clear sentence linked with accurate, varied transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “harvesting,” “limestone filter,” “evaporator,” “syrup” and “crystals,” which helps convey the diagram’s subject. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand, such as “diagrm,” “produceding,” “curshing,” “purfiying” and “contrifuge.” Some phrases are also imprecise or unnatural, including “in the form of sugar cane” and “crystalline form in sugar whears.” Aim to use the diagram’s labels accurately and choose straightforward process verbs, such as “passes through,” “is heated” and “separates.” Careful proofreading of spelling and collocations would make your meaning clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to describe a sequence using both simple statements and longer sentences, but grammatical control is weak and errors frequently make the process difficult to follow. For example, “the process pf sugar cane is consist on 7 stages” has problems with the verb construction and preposition, while “which start from growing seeds” does not form a complete, accurate clause. Agreement and verb forms are also inconsistent in “it has been growing” and “juices comes.” Punctuation and sentence boundaries need attention: the overview ends abruptly, and the final process sentence joins several stages without clear separation. Practise accurate passive forms for process descriptions, such as “the cane is crushed” and “the juice is heated,” and build shorter, complete sentences before attempting longer ones.

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