Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many countries across the globe, there are increasingly of a number of individuals opting for personal fitness instructor rather than a traditonal sports or attending group classes. The primary catalyst for this trend is the demand for time efficiency and flexibilty. And I believe this is a negative development because of the high cost that is involved and lack of social interaction.

First and foremost, the major reason for hiring a personal tariner is because of the schedule of busy professionals. They plan their routine in order to have time for physical activies. Consequently, this help them to manage their time effectively in order not to affect their professional duties with their personal activities. Furthermore, they prefer to have one on one training rather than being in group class.

Despite this conspicious benefits, there are some drawbacks which makes this trend to be unavailable for all. Exorbitant price of employing an instructor for one is too high for some individuals to afford. A prime example of this is the lower-income earner. They opt for class

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify a relevant reason for the trend—busy professionals value flexible, time-efficient training—and give a clear negative position based on cost and reduced social interaction. However, the response develops only the time-management reason, while the social-interaction point is stated in the introduction but not explained in the body. The discussion of cost begins with “lower-income earner” but ends abruptly at “They opt for class,” so the example and its connection to your view are incomplete. The response also falls 74 words short of the required minimum, which leaves the task only minimally addressed. To strengthen it, complete both sides of the discussion, explain the social consequences, and support each point with a developed example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining one reason, and a paragraph beginning to discuss disadvantages. Linking phrases such as “First and foremost,” “Consequently,” and “Furthermore” help signal relationships between ideas. However, progression is limited because the second body paragraph stops mid-thought at “They opt for class,” and the promised point about reduced social interaction is not developed. Some connections are also unclear: “Despite this conspicious benefits” does not clearly show how the benefits relate to the drawbacks that follow. Use complete paragraphs with a clear topic sentence, explanation, and example, and make sure each linking phrase accurately expresses the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You show an adequate range and attempt some less common expressions, including “primary catalyst,” “time efficiency,” and “Exorbitant price.” These choices communicate the main ideas, although some are not natural in context: “primary catalyst” is rather formal for this point, and “time efficiency” would be more idiomatic as “time efficiency” only in a different construction, such as “improve time efficiency.” Spelling errors such as “traditonal,” “flexibilty,” “tariner,” and “conspicious” are noticeable, though the intended meanings are generally recoverable. There are also awkward word combinations, including “a personal fitness instructor rather than a traditional sports.” Work on accurate spelling and natural collocations, and choose vocabulary that fits the exact meaning you want to express.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including the cause-and-effect sentence beginning “Consequently” and the contrast structure “Despite…”. Most of the intended meaning can be understood, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “there are increasingly of a number of individuals” has an incorrect construction; “this help them” needs subject–verb agreement; and “drawbacks which makes” also has an agreement error. The opening sentence lacks a clear grammatical comparison, and “Despite this conspicious benefits” has a number mismatch between “this” and “benefits.” Aim to build accurate sentence patterns first, check singular and plural agreement, and proofread articles and sentence boundaries.

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