Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Growing amount of people in some different countries pays for a personal fitness trainer than doing exercise class and play sports. In my opinion, the reason for this is conveniency and I would say that it is a mixed of positive and negative development.

Some people tends to hire for a personal trainer because it is more easier for them to follow their schedules and get their target goals. In this generation, people tend to rely on a trainer for the reason that they want to do it precisely and properly. Knowing that coaches knows all the things that he is doing, it would be convenient for those people who are busy to do excercise. Aside from that, having a personal coach focuses with your development because at that time, you are the only one who he is working with.

Playing sports helps us with our health journey, it is somehow a kind of excercise because we are moving our body, however, we can not be sure what is our target goal by just playing that kind of sport. For example, running, we know that running may help us with our breathing but what elso do we know about it? we are just doing the action but we do not know the advantages and disadvantages of these actions. In terms of excercise class, it is also a good choice because you have your instructor that helps you with your target goal but, there's a lot of students like you that needs different attention.

In my opinion, all of these have their advantages and drawbacks. Hiring a personal trainer helps you achieve goals faster and precisely however, you really have to prepare money for the payment and it will cost you much. In playing sports and doing excercise class, the advantage for these were you can socialize and meet new friends while doing it. It will also help you to be motivated since you are doing it with your friends or family but there is a possibility that you will be achieving your goals in a more slower pace.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: convenience is given as a reason for hiring a trainer, and you present the trend as having both benefits and drawbacks. Relevant support includes the trainer’s individual attention and the cost, while sports and classes are linked to socialising and motivation. However, some points are less fully developed than others. The claim that people rely on trainers to exercise “precisely and properly” could be explained with a specific example, and the discussion of sports focuses more on uncertainty about goals than on why people choose them instead of trainers. Make the positive or negative judgement more decisive, then develop each reason with a clear explanation or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: it introduces the topic and position, discusses reasons, compares sports and classes, and ends with a balanced view. Paragraphs generally have clear purposes, and linking phrases such as “Aside from that,” “For example,” and “In my opinion” help guide the reader. At times, however, connections are mechanical or the reference is unclear. In “these actions,” it is not immediately clear which actions are meant, and the shift from the benefits of sports to uncertainty about their goals could be smoother. The final paragraph also repeats the mixed-view position rather than drawing the comparison together. Use clearer references and make each paragraph’s progression explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “personal trainer,” “target goals,” “socialize,” “motivated,” and “drawbacks.” There are also attempts at more specific phrasing, such as “individual attention” in the discussion of a trainer’s focus, though the wording is not always natural. Several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems reduce precision: “conveniency” is not the natural noun here, “more easier” is an incorrect form, and “elso” and “excercise” are misspelled. Repeated use of “help,” “goal,” and “doing” also limits flexibility. Build a more accurate range of fitness-related collocations and check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “because,” “however,” and “while,” and the overall meaning is usually clear. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with subject–verb agreement, articles, and comparative forms. For example, “Some people tends” should be “Some people tend,” and “coaches knows” should be “coaches know.” In “a mixed of positive and negative development,” the article and noun structure are faulty; a clearer form is “a mix of positive and negative effects.” There are also punctuation issues, such as the run-on transition in “For example, running …? we are just doing the action.” Review agreement and sentence boundaries, while continuing to use varied clause structures.

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