Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, it is quite evident that people are more focused in hiring a personal trainer rather than going out or playing any sports even doing exercise feels like a burden to them. In this essay we will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of of this development along with the reasons of this change.

There are several reasons why people are more keen towards hiring a personal trainer. Firstly, it is convenient for them. We all know that today world and time has become very fast one cannot take time out from the busy schedule and go to gym or focus on his fitness. Secondly, Personal trainers will customize their plan according to their likes or dislikes and can monitor their routine more effectively. Furthermore personal trainer will be focusing on them rather than a whole group which could be distracting for the trainer and it can cause hinder the daily progress of the person also

Conversely, I believe it is indeed a positive development as time is valuable and one can save it by hiring a personal trainer. Moreover I think personal trainer would give him personalized feedbacks and monitor the health of a person which can be very beneficial and it can also reduce the risk of injuries.

In conclusion, the growing popularity of personal fitness trainers is mainly driven by busy lifestyles and the demand for individualised exercise programmes. I consider it positive as it will promote a healthy lifestyle.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: you give reasons for hiring trainers, including convenience and tailored programmes, and clearly state that you see this as positive. The conclusion reinforces that view. However, several points are asserted rather than explained. For example, the claim that trainers save time is not illustrated, and the benefits of monitoring and injury prevention are mentioned without showing how they work or giving a relevant example. The opening also promises to discuss both advantages and disadvantages, but the essay does not develop a disadvantage. The response is 242 words, so it does not meet the 250-word minimum. Develop the main reasons and your evaluation with specific explanations or examples, and ensure the introduction accurately reflects the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining reasons, a paragraph giving your view, and a conclusion. Sequencing is generally clear, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” help the reader follow the argument. However, the opening says the essay will discuss “advantages and disadvantages,” while the body mainly presents benefits, creating an expectation that is not fulfilled. Some connections are also awkward: “Conversely” introduces another positive point rather than a contrast, and the long sentence ending “daily progress of the person also” is difficult to follow. Use linking expressions that accurately show the relationship between ideas, and divide or clarify longer sentences to make progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic-related vocabulary, including “personal trainer,” “customize their plan,” “personalized feedback,” “monitor,” and “risk of injuries.” These choices make the main ideas understandable, and “individualised exercise programmes” in the conclusion is suitably precise. Some word choices and collocations are less natural, however, such as “more focused in hiring,” “more keen towards hiring,” and “today world.” There is also repetition of “personal trainer” and “positive development,” while “feedbacks” is not the usual form of this uncountable noun. Aim for more natural collocations and vary repeated terms—for example, use “one-to-one coaching” or “fitness professional” where appropriate. This would make the vocabulary more precise and fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex structures, including the sentence beginning “Firstly” and the clause “which could be distracting for the trainer.” The overall meaning is usually clear, but some grammatical errors remain. In “today world and time has become very fast,” the possessive/article structure and subject–verb agreement need correction; “one cannot take time out … and go to gym” also shifts awkwardly between subjects and omits an article. The sentence about group distraction and daily progress is incomplete or poorly joined, and “it is positive” contains faulty spacing and punctuation. Check sentence boundaries, articles, agreement, and parallel structure. More accurate control of these patterns would make your complex sentences easier to read.

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