Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-07-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

In recent years, getting fitness training from a personal tutor has increased rather than spending time on outdoor activities or taking exercise classes in some parts of the world. I believe this is a positive development.

The primary reason for hiring a personal fitness trainer is an increased income level. People have a stronger support system that allows them to hire a personal health guide. This improves their health and status in the community, making them organized and health-conscious. Due to demanding jobs, some individuals do not get time to focus on their well-being and hire an experienced person to enlighten them. Thus, getting proper training becomes a necessary part of their life rather than doing exercise by themselves, as they are not aware of the process.

Additionally, some people are diagnosed with serious health problems. There is an immediate need for a person with a valuable source of knowledge who can provide them with training solely for their problem. Rather than practicing exercises by themselves, watching videos online could be dangerous for their health. They need an experienced guide who prioritizes their health over anything else.

I think this is a positive development; hiring a personal trainer could increase job opportunities in the market. This may boost the nation's employment levels. More and more people would engage in this field, which will be beneficial for society as well as individuals. People will become disciplined, strong, and follow a healthy routine.

To sum up, dependence on personal tutors is driven by factors like a stable career, health problems, as well as social status. Overall, it is a positive trend as it increases the employment rate of the country and awareness related to health.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for the trend and providing a clear position on whether it is a positive development. The ideas are relevant, such as the role of increased income and the need for specialized health guidance. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited; for instance, the link between hiring a trainer and 'status in the community' is mentioned but not fully explored. The argument regarding employment benefits is a good addition, but the essay could benefit from more specific examples or deeper analysis to reach a higher band. Overall, the position is consistent throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, such as the reasons for hiring a trainer and the positive impacts of this trend. Cohesive devices like 'The primary reason', 'Additionally', and 'To sum up' are used effectively to guide the reader. However, the transition between some sentences is slightly mechanical, and the referencing could be more varied. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different aspects of the task, contributing to an overall coherent flow of information.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate and appropriate for the task. The student uses some topic-specific terms like 'health-conscious', 'disciplined', and 'employment levels'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'personal tutor' (a fitness trainer is usually not referred to as a tutor) and 'enlighten them' (which is slightly unnatural in this context). While the range is sufficient to convey the message clearly, it lacks the sophistication and precision required for higher bands. The vocabulary is functional and allows for clear communication of ideas without significant repetition.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

The student demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. Most sentences are clear and easy to follow, and the grammar is generally accurate. There are occasional minor errors, such as 'dependence on personal tutors is driven by factors like a stable career', which is slightly awkward phrasing. Punctuation is generally correct, and the errors present do not impede communication. To improve, the student should aim for a wider variety of complex grammatical structures and ensure that subject-verb agreement and word order are consistently precise throughout the text.

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