Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-07-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
In recent times, Individuals are avoiding to playing outdoor sport and doing daily fitness exercise instead of this they are appointing a personal trainer to keep them fit. This trend has impacted positively. I will discuss the consequences and affects of this trend.
The major reason behind this change is increasing injuries while doing exercise and sport without getting professional information for all tools at gym or at sport ground. For instance, A recent study shows that it is rapidly increasing number of injury while lifting heavy weight at gym. Secondly, If they hire a professional trainer it is way easy for them to workout consistently without taking day off. Otherwise, People often seen just for a week after starting their gym membership after that they will disappear for long time. furthermore, It is best way to maintain their diet while calculating calories and according to that burning out by doing workout with help of trainer.
This is why most of celebrities are paying thousands of dollars to their trainer and strictly following their diets. Moreover, It is undeniable truth that without trainer nobody is going to push their limit by lifting or stretching more and trainer is well aware about that when to stop. In contrast, Everyone can not afford high salaries of trainers.
All in all, Desptie of this trend is not economical for everyone, It is nessesscity while doing work out to take all precaution for safety and get assistance from professionals. This will trend will increase more rocketly in nearer future.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention injury prevention and consistency as reasons, the explanation remains superficial. The discussion on whether it is a positive or negative development is also brief, focusing primarily on the cost barrier rather than a balanced analysis of the societal implications. To improve, ensure you provide more detailed examples and a more nuanced exploration of the 'positive or negative' aspect to meet the requirements for a higher band score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'instead of this' and 'furthermore' are used in ways that do not always flow naturally. There are also issues with referencing; the transition between the reasons for hiring a trainer and the discussion of the trend's impact is abrupt. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words more naturally and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that connects logically to the previous one.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there is a lack of precision and some noticeable errors in word choice and collocation. Phrases like 'professional information for all tools' and 'increasing number of injury' are unnatural. You attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary, such as 'maintaining their diet' and 'calculating calories', which is good. However, the range is limited, and the errors occasionally make the reader pause. To reach a higher band, focus on learning common collocations related to health and fitness and work on using more precise academic vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
There is a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. You frequently make errors with articles ('at gym', 'at sport ground'), verb forms ('avoiding to playing'), and pluralisation ('consequences and affects'). Punctuation is also problematic, with several run-on sentences and incorrect comma usage. While the meaning is generally clear, these frequent errors in basic grammar and sentence construction prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading your work to catch subject-verb agreement errors and article usage, and practice constructing more complex sentences with correct punctuation.
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