Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
People believe that hiring fitness trainer will give you perfect guidance of health. rather than playing physical activities.
so many peoples is working in the siting job and many people is working are work and home and many people is doing on bisnosh is not for doing every day woking and not playing in sport. there is the most problem in this peoples is every life is busy and then Avery one is not in giving the time in over self. and then people is not fit and healdy. That is the most of the people are hiring a personal fitness trainer. and then people is playing sports or doing exercise classes and they are next to great body and life trash is going to fresh and good life.
people is every day life is had working and cleaning. peplos are going to job and siting 8 to 12 horse. and then they are coming back to home they are so much tardy and peoples is not doing any other activity. They are going to home and after finsh eating peplos are going bad and rest. so this is a most inputted part is all people is stating a going gym and they are checking what is the our body is and work load is to much and personal life is inpotan to daily rotting.
The more and more people is hiring a personal fitness trainer rather than playing sport is enjoy then people .
The both are activety is very good but sum people is like is sport this enjoy movement . but so many peplos like good body they are going gym.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt—the reasons for hiring personal trainers and whether this is a positive or negative development. However, the ideas are underdeveloped and lack clarity. While you mention sedentary jobs and busy lifestyles as reasons, the explanation is repetitive and lacks specific examples or logical depth. The position regarding whether this trend is positive or negative is not clearly articulated or sustained throughout the essay. To improve, you should structure your response with clear topic sentences for each paragraph and provide more detailed, coherent arguments that directly answer the 'why' and 'is it positive/negative' components of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay lacks a clear logical progression. Paragraphing is present but does not effectively separate distinct ideas, leading to a disjointed flow. Cohesive devices are either missing or used incorrectly (e.g., the repetitive use of 'and then' and 'so'), which makes the text feel mechanical and difficult to follow. There is a lack of referencing, and the relationship between sentences is often unclear. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words such as 'furthermore', 'consequently', or 'in contrast' to connect your ideas, and ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed point.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate, which frequently impedes communication. There are numerous spelling errors (e.g., 'healdy', 'bisnosh', 'inpotan', 'peplos') and word choice issues (e.g., 'life trash is going to fresh', 'tardy' used instead of 'tired'). The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas, relying on basic, repetitive terms. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your vocabulary to include more precise terms related to health, fitness, and lifestyle, and pay closer attention to spelling and correct word usage in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that often distort meaning. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'so many peoples is working'), incorrect verb tenses, and sentence structure (e.g., 'peplos are going to job and siting 8 to 12 horse'). Punctuation is also problematic, with many sentence fragments and run-on sentences. The range of structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with errors. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles and prepositions before attempting more complex grammatical structures.
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