Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Today people have very hectic lifestyle. So far people are hiring personal trainer for fitness in some countries, despite of engaging themselves in sports or doing exercise. This essay will explain the reasons behind it and also spark its negative and positive development.

First reason of this can be consider is Trend. And social media is one the platform. People post videos and photos with their personal trainer, which further influence other watchers and create curiosity of having their own trainer. For instance, celebrities post their videos with their trainer, and the fans who follow them, hire their own trainer. Another reason is Need. Most of the people do not know proper steps of exercise and doing gym. While doing workout of their own can make physical damage. As they might can follow wrong postures and steps, thus can lead to big medical issue. Therefore, they better hire a trainer who can assist them.

Furthermore, people do not like to be in crowd and they want to be a side and focus on them only. Moreover, busy lifestyle do not allow folks to come together and participate in sports or other activities. As most of the people are having jobs. So, matching their timings is also a difficult task. For example, an employee works 9-5 job, may be another friend works night shift or evening shift. Therefore, this is challenging for them to be together and doing some sports activities.

In conclusion, people are earning and they are ready to pay for their fitness. But this makes less participation in sports activities, even though these are free and better way to make fitness. Thus, overall this is a negative development for the generation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for the trend (social media influence, safety, and scheduling) and providing a clear position on whether it is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the point regarding 'crowds' and 'busy lifestyles' is mentioned but could be expanded with more specific examples or deeper analysis to reach a higher band. The conclusion clearly states the writer's stance, but the reasoning behind why it is a 'negative development' is brief. To improve, ensure that each supporting point is fully explored with more detailed explanations or illustrative examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices such as 'First reason', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'First reason of this can be consider is Trend'. Additionally, some transitions between sentences feel abrupt. Improving the flow between sentences and using a wider variety of linking words would enhance the overall coherence. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the progression of ideas is generally easy to follow despite some minor lapses in logical flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'hectic lifestyle', 'physical damage', and 'postures'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'spark its negative and positive development' (instead of 'discuss') and 'doing gym' (instead of 'going to the gym'). The range is sufficient to communicate, but the lack of more sophisticated or varied vocabulary prevents a higher score. Focusing on collocations and more precise academic phrasing would be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, including issues with articles ('the platform'), subject-verb agreement ('busy lifestyle do not allow'), and preposition usage ('despite of'). Some sentences are also structurally awkward, such as 'As they might can follow wrong postures'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall accuracy. To improve, the writer should focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like verb forms and article usage.

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