Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In the modern era, masses from distinct countries are focusing on their fitness goals nowadays however, they are relying on fitness trainers more than playing outdoor sports or joining exercise clubs. I personally believe that this trend is following a negative motion and I will present the possible root causes for this trend in the upcoming paragraphs.

One of the most prominent reason is that the lack of fitness and nutritional knowledge among population as people on large scale are depending on personal trainers because they find them more convenient. Nonetheless, they end up spending expensive amounts for their fitness goals. Additionally, fit body can be achieved by joining local fitness centers or by playing sports because these activities are more cost-effective and flexible according to individual's schedule.

Expanding further, general information about fitness can also be gained through online sources such as Youtube, til-tok etcetra as there is no need of hiring such trainers. Moreover, residents can grab vast amount of knowledge because they are getting from multiple resources rather than just sticking to single entity. To cite an example, a beginner who started his fitness journey and joined the gym can get support from other people who are regular there and can ask his desired questions.

To recapitulate, this trend comes with positive and negative outcomes in both scenarios yet, I believe that knowledge and experience inherited from local fitness clubs or by playing different sports are far better than hiring personal trainers and it will give confident to those who always try to learn by themselves.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention convenience and lack of knowledge as reasons, the explanation remains superficial. The conclusion is slightly contradictory, as you state the trend has 'positive and negative outcomes' but then immediately argue that local clubs are 'far better,' which creates some confusion regarding your final stance. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are fully extended with more specific examples or logical consequences.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'Nonetheless,' 'Additionally,' and 'To recapitulate.' However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical. For instance, the transition in the second paragraph is slightly abrupt. Furthermore, the referencing is occasionally unclear; in the third paragraph, the phrase 'getting from multiple resources' lacks a clear subject. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body, and conclusion, which helps the reader follow the progression of your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'prominent,' 'cost-effective,' and 'recapitulate.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'expensive amounts' (should be 'large sums of money' or 'high costs') and 'negative motion' (should be 'negative trend'). The use of 'til-tok' is informal and should be avoided in an academic essay. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding informal abbreviations or brand names that do not fit the formal tone.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'One of the most prominent reason is' (should be 'reasons'), 'fit body can be achieved' (needs an article: 'a fit body'), and 'it will give confident' (should be 'confidence'). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. You should pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles to improve your accuracy.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.