Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Healthy lifestyle is becoming a huge uptrend in modern lifestyle. A number of countries citizen are hiring personal fitness trainer to achieve their desired physic. This essay will discuss the both advantages, disadvantages and my personal opinion on this matter.

First side of the coin will show the positive developments in people who like to get physical training on personal level. As the graph fitness trend upscales by time, the gym memberships are increasing day by day. Moreover, this leads to a big crowd under one roof and that results increase wait of turns to use a particular exercise machine. For instance, in my city their only a couple of trainer in each gym. Those trainers teach more that a hundred people each day which gives a very small amount of training time for an individuals. Regarding these terms high class individuals prefer hiring a personal fitness coach.

Second side of the coin displays a negative development in individuals by increased number of personal hired fitness trainers. This matter has a big impact on the world of socializing.

Group training environment leads in increase of social bonds and healthy relations in community. For example in some towns gyms have hired a permanent fitness trainers which increase the cost their memberships. Lower middle class people's pocket does not allow them to join gyms or get a personal training from a certified coach.

In conclusion, hiring a personal trainer is an asset but only for rich people. In my opinion gyms should have more number of certifies fitness trainer and they should also be mindful with the price of mem

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The essay addresses the prompt by identifying reasons for hiring personal trainers and discussing whether it is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. The reasons provided—crowded gyms and lack of individual attention—are relevant, but the discussion on whether it is a positive or negative development is slightly muddled. The essay mentions both sides but does not clearly articulate a strong, consistent position until the very end. To reach a higher band, ensure that each paragraph clearly links back to the prompt's question about the nature of the development, providing more depth and specific examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'First side of the coin' and 'Second side of the coin'. These phrases are repetitive and do not always transition smoothly between ideas. Additionally, some sentences lack logical flow, such as the transition from gym overcrowding to the conclusion about social bonds. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly improve the coherence of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors. For example, 'huge uptrend in modern lifestyle' and 'desired physic' (should be 'physique') are imprecise. The phrase 'high class individuals' is also slightly informal. While the student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'gym memberships' and 'certified coach', the range is somewhat limited. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring that words are used in their correct grammatical form.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('there only a couple of trainer'), missing articles ('increase wait of turns'), and incorrect pluralization ('certifies fitness trainer'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly in the final sentence which appears incomplete. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy would be highly beneficial.

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