Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In contemporary era, fitness plays a pivotal role in humans lives. Good health brings tremendious benefit in individuals life-style. In many nations, huge number of people employ s private fitness coaches. rather than involving in physical games or yoga and gym sessions. Thesedays, Individuals do not have adequate information about health and diet because of this prefer personal trainer for their fitness. This is a nagetive development as it is expansive thing and reduce our social skills.

The main reason why people hired own fitness staff is that they could improve physical health extremely effective and effortlessly with a coach. If individauls are working with their own trainer, they do not face any difficulties even though it is extremely beneficial to acquire personal tutor. For example, in many countries, people are spending huge ammount of money on the trainer beacuse gym and yoga lectures are opreate with large crowd. Therefore, they suffer multiple challenging on those classes due to that having a private trainer is very crucial.

Owning a private fitness teacher creates various advers impact in humans lives. Firtly, Coaches are extremely expansive due to that not every individuals can affort it. Moreover, not participate in sports leads to nagetive impact in our lives and we can not improves social skills if we hired personal fitness teacher.

To sum up, because of huge

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you identify reasons for hiring personal trainers and express a clear negative position, the arguments are underdeveloped. For instance, the claim that trainers reduce social skills is mentioned but not sufficiently explained or supported with logical reasoning. Furthermore, the essay is incomplete, ending abruptly in the conclusion. To improve, you must ensure all parts of the prompt are fully addressed with extended, relevant examples and ensure the essay reaches the required length to allow for a full discussion of your points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay shows some attempt at logical organization, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete nature of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'The main reason', 'For example', and 'Moreover', but they are sometimes used mechanically or with grammatical errors (e.g., 'due to that'). Paragraphing is present, but the final paragraph is unfinished, which disrupts the overall flow and coherence of the argument. Improving the transition between sentences and ensuring a complete structure will help improve this score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary range is limited and repetitive. There are frequent spelling errors, such as 'tremendious', 'Thesedays', 'nagetive', 'expansive' (used instead of 'expensive'), and 'affort'. These errors occasionally make the text difficult to follow. While you attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'contemporary era' and 'pivotal role', the misuse of words like 'expansive' for 'expensive' indicates a lack of precision. To reach a higher band, you should focus on accurate spelling and expanding your range of collocations related to health and fitness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Examples include 'In contemporary era' (missing article), 'humans lives' (missing possessive), 'huge number of people employ s private fitness coaches' (incorrect verb form), and 'they suffer multiple challenging' (incorrect word form). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several sentence fragments and run-on sentences. The high frequency of errors, particularly in basic subject-verb agreement and word forms, impedes the clarity of your writing. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy will be essential for improvement.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.