Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A healthy body keeps a healthy mind. It is argued that a large numbers of people are being engaged with personal fitness coaches instead of playing games or going for exercise class. From my perspective, there are some pros and corns for this development, one should keep in view while hiring a professional.

There are several reasons for recruiting personal trainers. To begin with, they can provide customised plan. While there are many plans available on YouTube, they are not well suited for every body. They build a plan according to body's need and work on it. For instance, My uncle reduce 10 kg weight after getting a customised workout and diet plan by a coach. Moreover, this development is safe. Trainers know about exercise bio mechanics and postures, so they watch every step to prevent any injury.

On contrast, playing with teams helps to build community. while playing with many members one can make friends easily and improve social and communication skills. Furthermore, Playing sports or taking exercise is cost effective. playing sport with a friend is cheap whereas hiring a personal trainer would be expensive and everyone cannot afford it. In addition, it is fun to take an exercise class. Individuals go for exercise class and while doing exercise with others they get involve in such a way that they forget their problems, hence improve their physical as well as mental health.

To conclude, although hiring a personal fitness coach can provide plans according to one's need and can save from injury, playing sports can helps in making friends, building communities and affordable. In my opinion, one should look for merits and demerits before hiring a professional for physical fitness or enrolling in an exercise class.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for hiring personal trainers and providing a balanced view on whether it is a positive or negative development. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited; for instance, the explanation of why personal trainers are 'safe' could be expanded with more detail on the risks of unsupervised exercise. The conclusion is a bit repetitive, merely restating the points rather than synthesising the argument. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with more nuanced analysis rather than just listing benefits and drawbacks.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organised into paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', 'On contrast', and 'In addition' are used to link ideas. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or misused, such as 'On contrast' (should be 'In contrast') and 'playing sport with a friend is cheap whereas hiring a personal trainer would be expensive'. The referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be smoother to improve the overall progression of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'customised plan' and 'bio mechanics'. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing or incorrect word choices, such as 'pros and corns' (should be 'pros and cons'), 'large numbers of people are being engaged with' (should be 'engaging'), and 'My uncle reduce 10 kg' (should be 'reduced'). These errors do not impede communication, but they limit the precision of the writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('playing sports can helps'), article usage ('going for exercise class'), and pluralisation ('a large numbers of people'). Punctuation is generally functional, though some sentences are slightly clunky. The range of structures is sufficient to convey the message, but the frequency of minor errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article consistency would significantly improve the accuracy.

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