Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Nowadays, an increasing number of people prefer hiring personal fitness trainers instead of participating in sports or group exercise. This trend has been attributed to various reasons. In my opinion, it is a negative development because it reduces social interactions with other members of the community.
To begin with, one major drawback is the inability of the individual to associate with other members of the society who have the same goal. This is because, exercise class always comprises of people from different cultures and backgrounds in the society and training personally will not give opportunity to socialize with others. For instance, there are usually social groups that are created at sport centers to enable members meet themselves and also support each other especially during special occasions.
In addition, playing sports with others improves general body strength and helps an individual understand the importance of team work. This is because it provides the opportunity to develop team spirit, understand weaknesses and build confidence. For example, working out in groups such as jogging makes one understand the importance of having a team and someone to rely on.
However, one major reason people prefer the services of a personal trainer is because they receive individualized guidance. This is because everyone has their different fitness goals. For instance someone trying to loose weight needs a different workout from someone who wants to build their muscle. This however makes exercise effective but without the help of a support group, they might likely not meet up with their preferred body goals.
In conclusion, although personal trainers give individualized workout sessions to make exercise effective, it does not change the fact that social interactions and developing team spirit is important for improving an individual lifestyle.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The position is clear from the introduction. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you provide reasons for the trend (individualized guidance), the discussion on why it is a negative development is slightly repetitive, focusing heavily on social interaction. To reach a higher band, ensure that the 'positive' side of the argument is acknowledged more thoroughly before refuting it, and provide more varied examples beyond just 'jogging' or 'social groups' to demonstrate a deeper exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'In addition', and 'However' to signal transitions between ideas. However, some of the referencing is slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition between the benefits of personal training and the conclusion feels a bit abrupt. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and each paragraph has a central topic, which helps the reader follow your argument without difficulty.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'individualized guidance', 'team spirit', and 'community'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'loose weight' (should be 'lose weight') and 'meet themselves' (should be 'meet each other'). While you attempt to use some less common vocabulary, the range is somewhat limited, and there is occasional repetition of basic terms. To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations and synonyms to avoid repeating words like 'society' or 'exercise' too frequently.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'exercise class always comprises of' (should be 'exercise classes always comprise') and 'they might likely not meet up with' (which is slightly redundant). Punctuation is generally correct, but there are minor issues with article usage and subject-verb agreement. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on refining your control over complex sentences and ensuring consistent subject-verb agreement throughout your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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