Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays in some countries, the number of individuals who give more preference to hire a professional fitness coach to stay fit instead of playing sports and doing exercise by themselves are increasing.

There are many reasons for this and one of them is that the people who used to do exercise with help of a fitness trainer find themselves with less knowledge about exercise and gym machines. They think that they will not be able to do the proper exercise without coaching. For example, different people have different bodies and if individuals don't have the information about how their body works and what exercise they need to do and what diet they need to follow, it is a very good idea to have a trainer and stay healthy.

However, some people like to play sports and do exercise by themselves for fitness. The reason for that is they have good knowledge about their bodies and moreover to hire a fitness trainer, individuals need money. But not having a coach helps them to save money. Additionally, some trainers do not do their work properly and it is better to exercise by themselves.

In conclusion, according to my perspective it is a positive development because having a personal fitness trainer helps individuals to stay fit and healthy. And if people will have good health, they can work effectively and helps to improve the country as well. Furthermore, there will be more job opportunities who have good knowledge about health and wanna give training.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for hiring personal trainers and an evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention the lack of knowledge about gym equipment and the cost factor, these points could be expanded with more specific examples or deeper analysis. The position is clear throughout, but the conclusion introduces a new point about job creation which was not previously discussed in the body paragraphs. To improve, ensure that all main arguments are introduced in the body and that each point is fully extended with clear reasoning or illustrative examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'However', 'Moreover', and 'Additionally' to link ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition between the reasons for hiring a trainer and the reasons for exercising alone could be more sophisticated. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but the final paragraph is a bit abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one will help elevate your score in this criterion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'professional fitness coach', 'effectively', and 'job opportunities'. However, the vocabulary is somewhat repetitive and lacks the precision required for higher bands. There are instances where word choice could be more natural, such as 'give more preference to hire' (prefer hiring) or 'do their work properly' (perform their duties effectively). To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more topic-specific collocations and less common lexical items, while ensuring they are used accurately in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include 'the number of individuals... are increasing' (should be 'is increasing'), 'with help of a fitness trainer' (should be 'with the help of'), and 'there will be more job opportunities who have' (should be 'for those who have'). These errors do not significantly impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles to improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.