Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Hiring personal trainers and professionals rather than playing outdoor sports or joining exercise classes, has recently got very popular in some countries. As everyone is busy, it is quite difficult to stay healthy and take out time to play sports or join classes. Hiring a person trainer makes it quite easy, as it gives you option to choose the time you want to workout.

Firstly, as in this modern world everyone tries to run as soon as they wake up. Having tight schedules where no one usually has time to play sports. Which makes them unfit and might also attract many diseases. In my personal experience, I feel more happy when i go on a run or do exercise. As it gives me motivation and encouragement to stay fit and healthy.

Moreover, playing sports or joining classes requires strict schedules. As most of us hardly gets time during first half of the day, hiring personal trainer is the only way to stay fit and healthy. Additionally, a personal trainer is an experienced professional in their field, which makes it easy to get in shape and stay fit in shorter timespan.

Furthermore, I believe everyone should remain active in some or the other way. The type of exercise does not matter in this journey to stay healthy. But even though having many benefits, there are few drawbacks, such as people forget how to play sports, as well as they might get into their comfort zone of working out at home.

To conclude, I believe the advantages overpowers the drawbacks. As hiring a personal trainer gives us the ease of doing exercise at our convenience, as well as getting accurate training from a professional. Which attracts many people to follow the trend recently.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention time constraints and professional guidance as reasons, these points are not fully explored with specific examples or deeper analysis. The position is clear, but the discussion of the 'negative' aspect is brief and lacks sufficient depth to reach a higher band. To improve, ensure each body paragraph provides a more detailed explanation and a concrete example to support your claims.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore' to link your points. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is slightly disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where the sentence structure is fragmented. The use of referencing is generally clear, but improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall coherence of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'fitness trainer', 'exercise classes', and 'shorter timespan'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on simpler phrasing. There are also minor issues with word choice, such as 'advantages overpowers' (should be 'outweigh') and 'take out time' (should be 'find time'). To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary and collocations related to health and lifestyle to demonstrate a wider range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as sentence fragments ('Having tight schedules where no one usually has time to play sports.') and subject-verb agreement issues ('most of us hardly gets time'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences ending prematurely. While these errors do not significantly impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on sentence construction and proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy will help improve your score in this criterion.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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