Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In today's busy world, a number of people hire personal trainers for them who guide them on their diet plans and in the gym to keep them fit and healthy. I believe that there are many reasons behind this phenomena and consider it as a positive change.
To commence with, one of the main reason is people's hectic schedules. Individuals are very busy in their work and personal lives and find it very hard to spare time for any outdoor physical activities like playing sports. Moreover, signing up with time consuming exercise classes like yoga classes or any group fitness classes let people enjoy very limited time with their families.
However, having a personal trainer or a coach benefits them in many different ways. For instance, a personal trainer would only be focused on his client's wellbeing, allowing him to help with better diet plans and exercises. Flexible timings according to a person's need is another advantage of this phenomena.
It is also undeniable that this practice holds some negative impacts. For example, every individual could not afford these trainers.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 180 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you address the reasons for hiring personal trainers and state your position, the arguments are underdeveloped. For example, you mention that people cannot afford trainers, but you do not elaborate on why this makes it a negative development or provide a balanced view. To achieve a higher band, you must extend your points with specific examples and ensure all parts of the prompt are explored in sufficient depth to meet the length requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Moreover', and 'However'. However, the flow is somewhat mechanical, and the transition between the positive aspects and the negative impact is abrupt. The final paragraph is very brief and lacks a concluding summary, which affects the overall coherence of the piece. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas are linked more fluidly throughout the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on somewhat repetitive phrasing, such as 'personal trainers' and 'exercise classes'. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'this phenomena' (which is plural; the singular is 'phenomenon'). To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms and collocations related to health, fitness, and lifestyle to demonstrate a wider lexical range and better control over word choice.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors. For instance, 'one of the main reason' should be 'one of the main reasons', and 'every individual could not afford' is slightly unnatural in this context. There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and pluralization. To reach a higher band, focus on increasing the variety of your sentence structures and proofreading for common errors in agreement and word forms.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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