Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

All around the globe, the idea of getting better in shape has been increasing frequently. Many people believes that getting a fitness coach would help them in a plethora of ways in terms of their personal health.On the other side, some believes that simply focusing on spending time on leisure activities like playing soccer, tennis, other outdoor sports and performing exercises, will help them in maintaining a healthy body.

However, the coin always have a two sides of an opinion. Including me, there are number of individuals who leans towards hiring a personal gym trainer. By doing this, it will help the people to take some time out from their busy work-life schedule. Because, there are greater chances to break the daily discipline, while being engaged busy in the daily job. Also, people can achieve their healthy lifestyle with the help of proper guidance from their personal fitness coach. Additionally, whenever one get a chance, performing the leisure activities like playing outdoor sports and doing some exercise will help them eventually.

Nevertheless, individuals focusing on only attending the exercise classes and playing sports will find difficulty in achieving their goals for physical fitness. This approach is very feasible for those who do not want a proper healthy lifestyle. Also, there are high chances of lacking the level knowledge in terms of nutrition and other fitness related terms.

In the conclusion, I opine that hiring a personal fitness coach has more advantages compare to the people believing that playing only sports and attending exercise classes will lead to a healthy lifestyle.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring a personal trainer and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. The reasons provided—such as 'busy work-life schedule' and 'proper guidance'—are relevant but could be expanded with more specific examples or deeper analysis. The position is clear throughout, but the argument regarding the negative aspects of sports/classes is slightly underdeveloped, as it relies on the assumption that these activities lack nutritional knowledge without sufficient justification. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully supported with detailed reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'However,' 'Additionally,' and 'Nevertheless,' which help guide the reader through the argument. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as the phrase 'the coin always have a two sides of an opinion,' which is a misused idiom. Paragraphing is generally appropriate, but the flow between sentences could be improved to create a more natural progression of ideas. Overall, the structure is coherent, but the management of cohesive devices needs more flexibility.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common phrases like 'plethora of ways' and 'busy work-life schedule.' However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'getting better in shape' (should be 'getting into better shape') and 'lacking the level knowledge' (should be 'lacking the level of knowledge'). These errors do not impede communication, but they indicate a need for more precise control over vocabulary and idiomatic expressions to move into the higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the accuracy of the writing. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'Many people believes' and 'the coin always have,' as well as 'whenever one get a chance.' Additionally, there are minor punctuation and article errors throughout the text. While the writer attempts complex structures, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic subject-verb agreement and proofreading for small slips would significantly improve the quality of the writing.

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