Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays health is becoming more important part in everyone's life after Covid pandemic. In some nations, many individuals are appointing a fitness coach, instead of playing any activities or doing exercise lessons. There are few reasons behind it which I will explain in upcoming paragraph. It has also some pros and cons which needs to be discuss as well.

Well in recent time people are getting familiar with the value of their fitness. Most of the humans are engaging with personal fitness instructor, rather than normal workout or play any sports, because a professional trainer knows where you lack in your body part, also which part needs more attention to grow and improve. Moreover, your fitness advisor knows the healthy diet such as protein, calories, vitamins, and many other things, which we should apply on daily basis to look and feel more confident and healthy, it also plays vital role in your routine life as well.

Talking about pros and cons, everything has their own plus and minus points at the same time. The best part is people are taking care of their health very seriously, and they want to look fit in front of people or anywhere they go. However, the negative side is that people may forget the enjoyment of live exercise sessions with their friends and family. Additionally, young people have very less time to play any sports, which they should play in their free time.

In conclusion, every topic has their own positive and negative development. People are improving and taking more care of their body language by getting appropriate knowledge from their personal trainer. While there are few negative parts as well such as they might miss the enjoyment of exercise classes and also they have less period of time to play any physical activities.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for hiring personal trainers and discussing whether this is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the explanation of why people hire trainers focuses on 'body parts' and 'diet' without exploring broader societal shifts, such as the desire for efficiency or status. The discussion on whether this is positive or negative is balanced but lacks depth; the points about 'enjoyment' and 'time' are mentioned but not fully extended. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific examples or deeper analysis of the implications of this trend.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear introduction and conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Moreover', 'However', and 'In conclusion', which help the flow of ideas. However, some transitions feel mechanical or slightly repetitive, such as the opening of each paragraph. The referencing is sometimes unclear; for example, the phrase 'everything has their own plus and minus points' is a bit vague. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the connection between sentences could be smoother to improve the overall readability and coherence of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some relevant terms like 'fitness instructor', 'healthy diet', and 'physical activities'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of awkward word choice or collocation, such as 'appointing a fitness coach' (hiring/engaging is more natural) and 'apply on daily basis' (implement/follow is better). There is also some repetition of basic vocabulary like 'positive' and 'negative'. To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations and a wider variety of topic-specific vocabulary to demonstrate greater flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('everything has their own', 'needs to be discuss'), article usage ('after Covid pandemic'), and awkward phrasing ('less period of time'). Punctuation is generally functional, but some sentences are run-on or lack necessary commas. To achieve a higher band, focus on improving your control over basic grammar, particularly subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, while continuing to experiment with more complex sentence forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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