Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Instead of playing sports or doing exercises, these days numerous individuals are hiring a personal fitness trainer in some nations. This essay will discuss the reasons of this trend and why this is a negative development in the paragraphs.

To commence with, these are various reasons why people hire a fitness trainer. First and foremost, nowadays individuals do not have enough time to play sports or to go to gym for doing exercises because they are exceedingly busy in their working life to complete the targets which are set by their employers. As a result, they hire a fitness trainer who comes in their home and trained them. Moreover, these days it has become trend to hire a personal fitness trainer. To explain, most of the individuals only hire a fitness trainer to show others even when there is no need and they mostly focus on making videos for posting on social media rather than doing exercises. For instance, in India 60% of people only hire personal gym trainers to show status symbol.

On the other hand, this is totally a negative development because it has awful impacts on the society. Firstly, it is a wastage of money. To explain, hiring a personal fitness trainer means spending a lot of money because professional trainers charge a huge amount of money which can be spent on other imperative things. In addition, there are number of platforms available where individuals can easily perform exercises instead of spending a lot of cash such as youtube videos, open gyms and so on. For example, a survey by BBC News reported that there are thousands of open gyms that are installed by the government so that people would not pay money on gyms or hiring fitness trainers.

To recapitulate, according to aforementioned reasons one can reach the conclusion that busy lifestyle and following trend are the main reasons of hiring a personal fitness trainer; however, this a negative development because it needs huge amount of money and everyone cannot afford a personal gym trainer.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for the trend and providing a clear position that it is a negative development. The ideas are relevant, such as the lack of time and the social media 'status symbol' aspect. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding the 'wastage of money' could be more nuanced by discussing the value of professional guidance versus the cost. While the position is clear throughout, the supporting evidence, such as the specific statistic about India, feels slightly anecdotal and could be better integrated into a more balanced discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence with', 'Moreover', and 'On the other hand', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical or repetitive. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the reasons from the evaluation of the trend. Referencing is generally clear, though some sentences, such as 'according to aforementioned reasons one can reach the conclusion', are slightly clunky and could be improved for better flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common items like 'imperative', 'recapitulate', and 'status symbol'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'comes in their home and trained them' (should be 'comes to their home and trains them') and 'there are number of platforms' (missing article 'a'). The range is sufficient to convey meaning, but more precise and varied vocabulary would be needed to reach a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb tense consistency ('comes in their home and trained them') and article usage ('the' or 'a' missing before nouns). Some sentences are slightly awkward, such as 'it has become trend' instead of 'it has become a trend'. Despite these errors, the grammar does not impede communication, and the writer demonstrates an ability to construct complex sentences, even if they are not always perfectly accurate.

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