Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Well here I would like to talk about fitness because me myself i am into fitness.

Now a days being fit is a very important things in each and every ones life it play a vital role. Being into fitness give people more strength and feel more energetic. Moreover if we see many of them have become to much foodie. They do not take care of the health then they get all kind of sickness in the body. So now everyone has become wiser, like they have kept personal trainer to be fit which is good.

But most probably playing sports is also a very healthy and a wise decision because if we see the benefits in the sports for instance like playing football, swimming, basket ball, cricket in this kinds of sports there is to much running in that way our body sweats and it tries to reduce the weight. As per my point of view class exercise are very common.

Now here I would like to share my thoughts on this keeping a personal trainer is very good because they give weekly exercise and the part where I ca highlight is the diet chart. Mainly following diet chart is the most difficult part for many people, but it is good if some follows. Moreover if we see sports is very good for every one and as per my knowledge if we are good at any sports and we do good so we go to international games and we can have name and fame.

According to me people should be in both activity sports and fitness.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by identifying reasons for hiring personal trainers and offering an opinion on whether it is a positive development. However, the development of ideas is superficial. For example, the reasons provided for hiring trainers are limited to diet charts and convenience, and the discussion on sports is somewhat tangential. The essay lacks a clear structure, and the position is not consistently maintained or well-supported throughout. To reach a higher band, you need to provide more detailed explanations and specific examples for each point raised, ensuring that every paragraph directly contributes to answering the two-part question.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear logical progression. While there are some attempts at paragraphing, the transitions between ideas are often abrupt or missing. For instance, the shift from discussing personal trainers to the benefits of sports is disjointed. Cohesive devices are used in a very mechanical and repetitive way, such as the frequent use of 'Moreover' and 'if we see'. The lack of clear topic sentences makes it difficult for the reader to follow your argument. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a single, clear focus would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive, which limits your ability to express complex ideas. Phrases like 'too much foodie' and 'get all kind of sickness' are informal and imprecise. There is little evidence of less common lexical items or an awareness of collocation. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of variety and the reliance on simple, conversational language prevent the essay from achieving a higher score. You should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to health and fitness, such as 'sedentary lifestyle', 'tailored fitness regime', or 'nutritional guidance'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'it play a vital role'), article usage, and sentence structure (e.g., 'me myself i am into fitness'). The range of structures is limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with some awkward attempts at complex ones. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of commas and capitalization. To improve, you need to focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like pluralization and verb tense consistency.

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